The Office Mole

'The Office Mole' was a book idea which was too derivative and generic to ever get anywhere. The plot had the book ever been written would have been around the underground town flooding and the moles have to go down the great tunnel to unknown territories.

The Office Mole bit was because the main characters were the tunnel builders who were intelligent builders with rules of management and a good sense of bureaucracy.

It was in the style of a Terry Pratchett novel.

All that is left are a few random pages of notes and the odd sketch of dialogue.

Standard Disclaimer: This might not be funny to most people.

'Lets Go North'

A group of moles wearing yellow builders helmets in an underground chamber.
Mole 1 is the leader with a clipboard.

Mole 1: So let's go north
Mole 2: It's the only route left.
Mole 3: Under open grassland, what could go wrong.

[slight pause, everyone looks at each other nervously]

Mole 4: Well if this was a film...
Mole 2: Which it isn't.
Mole 4: Yes, but if it was a film, taking the safest option would be where the alien turns up and rips everyone limb from limb.
Mole 1: So anyway...
Mole 2: So your saying we need the slightly riskier option than the safest option...
Mole 4: Not really.
Mole 1: Mind you nobody in a film has ever said "Lets go north" its usually south, east or west.
Mole 3: True.
Mole 1: So North?
Moles: North!
Mole 4: Checking for Mutant aliens first.
Mole 2: Yup just to be safe.
Mole 3: You know I think that would make a solid rule of management.
Mole 2: Sort of 'Rule 429 - Check for mutant aliens first'
Mole 1: So anyway North then.
Mole 3: North. I'll go first.
Mole 2 (whispers): It;s always the one up front that gets it first.
Mole 3: Isn't it lunch time though, don't want to go tunnelling on an empty stomach.
Moles: True, Lunch time.
Mole 1: But we need to get digging.
Mole 3: Union rules. Have to take our one hour lunch break.