Salary converter - convert annual to hourly, weekly, daily or anything

My new site is all done. The salary converter I made ages ago now has its very own home on the internet. SalaryConverter.co.uk

You can convert salary between any of the following annual, monthly, four weekly, daily and hourly.

Very useful for job hunting especially as a temp where everyone quotes different rates.

Hard to reach customer groups

I was in an interesting meeting the other day with our new advertising agency. I wasn't supposed to be attending as I wasn't supposed to be at head office and the meeting was only vaguely connected to my work. It was about recruitment but a different project.

As I was at a loose end I popped along, it was a good opportunity to size up the agency contacts on something I didn't necessarily care about.

The interesting thing was that the whole meeting was about how to reach a customer group we don't normally reach. We as an organisation recognised this groups impact on our business and recognised that the way we normally advertise i.e in local media, didn't reach them.

Another good point was that the project team had determined that the best way to determine the key messages for this group was to talk to a focus group of these customers.

After that it went down hill, the group decided that they didn't have the contacts and couldn't afford either the time or money to make the contacts.

The project team then set about assuming what the key messages were and that print media still worked as it did last year with a different customer group.

At this point another colleague pointed out that we had already decided this approach hadn't worked, so why were we resurrecting it, they pretty much got blank looks.

So I weighed in, pointed out it was a different customer group and there was no reason to suggest that approach would work, so why would we waste money.

There was a good ten seconds of blank looks including a staring contest with a senior manager.

You cant win them all ... I am looking forward to the traditional print campaign which achieves nothing not because it was the wrong approach just because the customer group is hard to reach. The really annoying thing is by that time nobody will remember the conversation that the key thing was to talk to the customer group before deciding on the message. My mate Sir Alan would have sacked several of the muppets present in the room.

Is it me or is the first step to talking to your customers actually finding a customer and talking to them.

Seriously, how hard is it?

Salary Converter V2.0 - Convert annual to hourly, weekly, anything

I finished the major upgrades today.

You can now convert from hourly, daily, weekly, 4-weekly, monthly or annual to hourly, daily, weekly, 4-weekly, monthly and annual pay figures.

In addition I have incorporated amendments for part time and non standard working weeks. The original version had an assumption that everybody worked 37 hours a week and five days a week. Clearly for people that did not their daily rates and hourly rates would be wrong.

A nice little project which will be extremely useful when job hunting. Now I can compare rates between jobs however they put the pay on the advert.

Unless anybody else has any suggestion I really cant see any further improvements to be made. Jobs a good 'un as I always say.

Lets talk to some 10 year olds about technology

This is one of those articles which makes you feel old even when your not really. Ten year olds do not remember rotary phones, they are blissfully unaware of what life was like BI (before internet).

The BBC news website team, to celebrate their ten years of existence rounded up some ten years olds and talked to them about future technology.

One of the things they showed these kids was a rotary dial phone:

"I've seen these in movies but never used one before," said one. Another added: "I've seen one in Heartbeat. It must be hard to remember numbers."

My parents had a rotary phone in the 80's when I was a kid. Numbers were not hard to remember, I know its out of fashion but we memorised them.

I know several numbers off by heart, my home phone, my mobile, my work phone, several old work numbers. After all before mobile phones I had a phone card and a charge card, if we needed a number we memorised it or wrote it down.

I also remember when every phone call was from a withheld number and the only way to find out who was calling was to pick up the damn phone.

In recruitment trying to arrange interviews can be a nightmare, the idea of a mobile is for people to be contactable, not for them to stare at the screen because it is a withheld number and then let it go to answer phone or worse just ignore it. I would not mind but anyone that has applied for a job should expect calls from withheld numbers because those are the numbers recruiters call from.

So here is a test to see how old you are: Do you know off by heart your mobile and home phone number?

How many people have had the following conversation on their mobile:

Other person: "What's your number?"
You: "Hang on, I will have to look?

Maybe I am whinging on about things, but is this not the first step of relying on technology too much.

These everyday tasks of memory work the brain muscle which in this electronic age is starting to waste away.

We have been through a lot of temps recently at work and one of the first things we have to tell them is to write things down. Even with all the electronic assistance we have you still need to keep, process and organise a lot of information in your head. If you are not able to memorise your own phone number it is going to be an uphill struggle.

I feel a bit like an old man writing this article but maybe its because technology moves on at such a rate that the only people who are young any more are the ten year olds. Even teenagers are out of date, technology has moved on.

How to ... pick your targets

The Simon Cowell approach.

Think of the job you want to apply for think of your skills, qualifications and experience for the job. Now Simon has the list of skills, qualifications and experience in front of him. You walk into the room and he ticks them off one by one. At the end of the interview he will either tell you, you have the job or tell you its not for you. Be honest because Simon will, are you good enough?

The reason I bring Simon Cowell into recruitment is because everyone has seen on the X-factor all those people who have deluded themselves that they are the next number 1 star and it is clear to everyone they are not. Applications are just the same, are you deluding yourself that you are the best?

The Way forward.

Create the check-list of skills, qualifications and experience for the job you want. Tick off the ones you already have, err on the side of caution or better still get someone else to objectively tick off the list.

For most jobs I recommend that you need at least half of the list ticked to stand a chance and that is just to get through to the next stage, not necessarily the job.

If you have less than half checked you have a few choices:

• Go for a lower position and work your way up.
• Do volunteer work in your spare time to give you some more relevant experience.
• Study for some of the qualifications.

Keep doing all of the above while you continue to make applications. Although you will get a lot of knock backs you are gaining experience and continue to add to the ticks on the list. Sooner or later you should get where you want to go but be prepared for the long haul.

If you are not prepared for the long haul and still have less than half checked really think about whether there is any point in applying. Consider how competitive the field is as well, will there be lots of high quality applicants? Your application as well as being considered in isolation will be compared to all the other applications. Recruiters do not have time to interview everyone who meet the minimum check-list criteria.

In the UK the public sector and sometimes the private sector create the check-list for you, it is the person specification. In short-listing the person specification is just checked against the application, depending on the number of applicants and the quality a score threshold is put in place and everyone above that score is invited to interview. So the higher your score the better chance you have of being interviewed.

So the first step in an application should be about being realistic about which jobs you are going to apply for. Pick your targets and put your efforts into securing that job. The scatter gun method of applying for every job rarely works.

A good application will take time to put together and therefore you need to choose carefully which jobs you apply for, after all you do not want to waste your time do you.

Next up How to ... write a good CV

How to ... Introduction

They sometimes say it is best to write about what you know, most of this blog is just random thoughts straying down my fingers and typed into words. A lot of the blog is simply a post it note for my brain, it saves having to remember everything.

I work in HR and I have previously shared some of my interview experiences offering some tips to people to give them a good chance at getting the job they want.

For one recent mass recruitment project I wrote a two page guidance note for people that did not get short-listed. Due to the numbers involved we were unable to offer specific feedback and too be honest the feedback for all of the 'regrets' (what we politely call failures) was exactly the same. They all made the same mistakes.

Recently I interviewed a candidate who had failed the first time round, on the short walk to the interview room they explained how I had helped them last time they applied, how they had taken the feedback away and really taken the information on board. They then explained how this was there nth application for the job and they were a bit nervous because it meant so much to them.

I had looked at both their new and old application form, they really had taken the advice and had nailed the application second time around.

At interview they nailed that too, although nervous they clearly emphasised their skills, experience and suitability for the job. It struck me that without that bit of advice I gave them originally they might have missed out on a job and we would have missed out on a great new employee.

Sometimes all people need is a bit of advice and no one in the recruitment world really gives practical advice especially in the early stages. The recruitment process is not perfect, we can only hire those who evidence their ability, if your not good at interviews or application forms we could easily miss you.

I have decided to write a short series of 'How to...' articles to help those that are looking for practical advice on how not to miss out on a job they could do.

First up 'How to ... pick your targets.'

Coconut Skins and the Coconut Factory

I was busy licking coconut skins (interviewing candidates) yesterday. It was a long day but there was some very good candidates who will be an asset to the organisation. Thankfully even the bad ones were not nutters, they were just not good enough this time.

The only tips that came out of yesterday was keep your hands still. At least two people were significantly fidgety that it was distracting me. I know as a candidate you may be nervous but it is best to avoid holding anything in your hands and not to play with your clothes.

I made the best fool out of myself yesterday, I temporarily lost my pen and the candidate needed one to sign some paperwork. The candidate pointed out it was already in my hand. Doh!

The chairs were a bit rubbish as well, one day in those was liking flying on a budget airline.

I was interviewing in one of the executive office blocks the organisation owns. The walls were covered in inspirational quote pictures, plenty of office space, newly decorated, the works. Just the kind of building occupied by people who go no where near the sharp end of the business and just issue edicts from their ivory tower.

Any workplace that has inspirational posters on the wall is either trying too hard or is detached from reality. Posters may even go as far as to suggest that management have used them as a sticking plaster to appease a disgruntled work force. Management seem to have this idea that inspirational posters really help.

Of course as it was all in an executive suite with guards and hyper efficient receptionists, security was very tight even the kitchen had a numeric key lock. I will be glad on Monday to return to the coal face, my trip into executive land seems like a scary psychedelic dream.

Interviews - they are not all the same

Another day of interviews and the usual reminders /pleas. If you have been invited to an interview please research the company and the role. We will be testing your knowledge / understanding of the role and the organisation. After all it is a job interview.

Some more unusual tips from today's interviews. If you take something with you to interview whether it is a folder, bag or just some papers put them down when you get into the interview room anything else and it makes you look nervous and may distract the interviewer.

Hands, the old difficult decision, what to do with your hands. Hand gestures while talking are fine, it suggest enthusiasm, folded arms is a negative signal and be aware of making gestures in your lap. Men or women, do not sit with your legs akimbo making hand gestures in front of your crotch. Best option is to rest your hands in your lap 'demurely' with legs together or crossed.

Finally remember your interviewer is human too, contrary to popular belief we are not out to get you. Pay attention to body language from the interviewer: Do they look interested? Are they glazing over? Are they still writing notes? If your not sure you can ask does that answer your question or if there is anything that you missed out.

As an interviewer I can tell you the interview is not about finding out who is good at interviews but about trying to get the best out of you. Think of yourself as a sponge and the interviewer is trying to ring you out. If they ask follow up questions they are either expecting more or think that you have more to give. Follow up questions are not necessarily bad they mean you are still in with a chance.

A tribute to the blog 'indexd'

You may have noticed that at the bottom of the left column I have a small list of 'blogs of note'.

One of them is 'indexd' by Jessica Hagy which is a selection of index cards. In her own words she describes her blog as:

"This site is a little project that lets me make fun of some things and sense of others. I use it to think a little more relationally without resorting to doing actual math."

It is a truly unique blog and I can truly recommend it.

Anyway my mind works the same way occasionally and I can see mathematical relationships in my head, mainly the curve graph types.

Although I consider myself to be a good interviewer I consider myself to be a bad interviewee, my biggest weakness is the throwaway comment. A throwaway comment is a generalisation or casual comment which you might use with work colleagues. I have been know to drop some real clangers in my time. Examples I have used to my regret, are "you know what manager's are like?" and "typical management come up with ideas and then have no idea how to implement them". There are of course others but I have blocked them out of my mind.

Before anyone says anything, yes, I know they are true but for some reason at interviews people don't want to know about reality they want you to 'fake it till you make it'. I am quite cynical about some interviews but have not found a better way yet.

So anyway the tribute bit is knocking up an index card which mathematically demonstrated the principle of throwaway comments in relation to interview success.

Random Thought: Horses and sheep

I have a friend who has a horse who lives in a field of sheep. They co-exist sharing the same space and grass.

This got me thinking, what do they think of each other.

I have a few questions:

• Can a sheep actually see a horse's head or does it just see four legs?
  
• Can a horse recognise a sheep or does it think there are fluffy clouds in his / her field?
  
• Would a horse with vertigo when put in a field of sheep fall over because it thought it was looking down on the clouds?
• Do both animals just think of the other as a moving non edible patch of grass?
• Do they sleep together for comfort /warmth?
• Would sheep stand under a horse to shelter from the rain?
• Do sheep think of the horse as a really big sheep?
• Does the horse think of the sheep as really small horses?
• Who is boss the horse or the sheep?
• What do the sheep think when there is a rider on the horse's back?

I am not saying this kind of question keeps me awake at night but they would be things I would be interested in finding out. So come on David Attenborough or Bill Oddie forgot about your savannah stories or your spring watch lets have life in a field.

You may now have been wondering why this post has also been tagged recruitment, well I thought the horse / sheep thing could be developed into one of those obscure interview questions.

A reed magazine dropped into my in-tray suggesting that you should never ever ask these questions. Not that I would but they are an interesting reserve questions for people that are clearly con-interviewees (expert interviewees - so practised they have text book answers). Typical examples would be executive managers who are so good at spouting management speak but have no common sense. A good sheep / horse question might catch them out, as they would have to think on their feet.

Scenario question:

You are the line manager of a field containing one horse and five sheep? As part of the internal development of the team, the team are asked to describe their opposite colleagues including their strengths and weaknesses. You as the line manager are reading the reports.
What does the horse say about his / her sheep colleagues?
What do the sheep say about the horse?
How as a team leader will you address the identified weaknesses?

Well that is one interview question that will never get used, but it does make you think / laugh / cry (delete as applicable).

Of all the interview rooms in all the world you had to walk into mine

Well while I was out of the office licking coconut skins I had a good fun day. I always forget how much I miss interviewing people, spending time getting to know them and finding out more about people that previously I have only ever known on paper.

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times"

-Opening line from "A Tale of two cities" by Charles Dickens

That would be an an apt description of the day, I saw some of the best candidates and some of the worst candidates I have ever seen. As I have said before we try to make our interviews friendly and less confrontational but it is important as a candidate not to treat it as a talk with friends. You have to ensure that you don't make throw away comments that may reflect badly on you with people that don't know you.

I myself do it all the time in interviews, in one particularly poor example of my own I made a joke about how managers notoriously come up with ideas and left it to other people to sort out the details (Ok we all know its true but it is still on the list of banned topics at interview). Of course as I was being interviewed by managers they picked up on it.

The other learning point from the interviews is the usual one of research, research and research again. These are the easy questions that should be easy to get points for and they are some of the more important ones. Examples include:

Why are you applying for the job?
What do you know about "company concept"?
What do you know about the company?
What have you done to prepare for today's interview?
What do you think about this company project/ advertising / other etc?
What do you think are the challenges that face our business?

If you don't do the research you wont know the answers and even worse you could be forced to waffle through a question which leaves the interviewer with the impression that you don't really want the job.

I have previously mentioned the canteen at this site talking about their tendency to cremate bacon. As you know I need my coffee to get through my interview days and I started off with a cappuccino.

How wrong can you go with a cappuccino, you put the coffee granules in the cup, pour the milk on top and stir a bit to make sure its mixed and then pour some extra frothed milk on top. Simple really, so why did I have barely dissolved coffee granules on the top of my froth.

Good job I am not the incredible hulk, I would have torn my interview suit.

Although the pannini at lunch was nice and the filter coffee is always a pleasure.

'The Apprentice' - the Interview Week

I only just caught the repeat but I thought as it is one of my favourite weeks I would write up some notes.

So after Naomi's exit last week, which was a shame as I liked her she was a lovely lady, we move on to the interview task.

I like the interview special, a bit of aggressive interviewing, you don't have to be nice to the candidates. If you think they are making it up or fumbling then you challenge them. I would happily give that a go, so Sir Alan if you need someone from HR to help out give me a call. Although I can imagine what Sir Alan might have to say about people in HR, I think it might not be repeatable in polite company.

Pre Interview quotes

Tre: " I was handling board meetings at 18"

Simon" If someone tells me to turn left I will immediately turn right"
[I hope the police have taken note, here is a man who should not have been able to pass his driving test]

Katie: "I have a ruthless streak with an edge to it and I'm not afraid to use it"
[Now that is a dangerous weapon]

The Interviews

The three experts as before were: Claude Litner (global trouble shooter), Bordan Tkachuk (Chief Executive Viglen computers), and Paul Kemsley (property developer / friend).

Tre:"I don't think I know how to be shy"

Tre:" I have a home office and an office abroad"
[Tre talks about his extensive business empire which seemed to belong to his family rather than him.]

Tre:"It's not a bedroom it's a home office"
[Tre gets a bit touchy when challenged about his bedroom / home office.]

Katie: "I didn't get to where I am staying at home playing mummy... I don't need maternity leave any of that bull."
[I am not sure she did herself any favours there.]

Lohit: "I'm a leader... I'm not here to be nice."
[What a nice little comment, oh wait he didn't mean to be nice that is him trying to sound ruthless.]

The Consultants meeting with Sir Alan

About Tre:

Paul: "Tre runs a global corporation from a bedroom... He's a fantasist."

Claude: "He did zero research"

Sir Alan to Paul: "He wont be on your Christmas card list."

About Kristina:

Claude: "Strong positives... hasn't really progressed very well...competent, hard working... credible candidate."

Bordan: "Bright, Cheery."

Paul: "Good person, high integrity."

About Katie:

Paul: "Powerful aggressive lady... couldn't work with her day in day out, do my head in... she's a go getter"

Claude: "She is a showman... I wouldn't let her run a company... she hasn't got a clue."

Bordan: "She is totally ruthless... What's her motivation to be on the apprentice... She's got something... It's only about winning for Katie... Is this just a leapfrog for something else"

About Lohit:

Claude: "Least credible... Deeply unimpressed."

Sir Alan: "I don't think he actually knows what he is saying most of the time"

Paul: "Nice guy, boring."

About Simon:

Paul: "He is a gross underachiever... He hasn't done anything"

Bordan: "Hit hard, couldn't recover from it."

Claude: "I wouldn't write him off... given the change he could succeed."

The final chance

Lohit to Sir Alan: "I'm not trying to convince myself, I'm trying to convince you."
[I like this quote it was honest.]

Your Fired!

Tre when asked about the difficult interview:" He wouldn't let me finish a sentance..."(at this point he was interrupted by Sir Alan).
[What is the secret of comedy, Sir Alan knows it is timing.]

Your Fired!

Then it was Katie's turn to face the spotlight...

Your in the final!

Katie:"I don't want to make a fool of you, I don't want to make a fool of me... Ok...erm... I think its more important to get my plans in place... I suggest I stand down."

You... resign?!?

I have to say she did look very torn and it was obviously a very difficult decision for her to make but the jury is out on whether she really wanted to win anyway. The cynic inside of me says that she wanted to go to a point where she could could turn Sir Alan down and say to everyone that it could of been her. However, if that was the case it was also clear she was choosing a point where no one else lost out because of her game plan.

Alternatively everything she said could have been completely heart felt and it was a really difficult decision for her. For me the jury is still out.

Which left Kristina and Simon in the grand final tomorrow night...

If you need more apprentice news you can have a look at what happened to last years candidates.

Once more unto the pile of work

My desk has been like a bomb site lately, it looks like a paperwork bomb has exploded. There is only one casualty me.

One side affect of stress is less patience with people. Usually I am the "extra mile" guy, willing to go out of my way to help people, take on other people's problem's and sort them out myself.

At the moment I have enough problems of my own so I am a bit fed up with people bringing me problems they could quite happily sort out themselves. Usually I help them but to a lesser extent than I normally would, after all they should help themselves for a change.

So people ring up, bring their problem to me and the response that springs to mind is that "I don't care" which reminded me of the following except from the Film "The Fugitive" (1993).

Richard Kimble (Harrison Ford)I didn't kill my wife.
Deputy Marshal Samuel Gerard (Tommy Lee Jones): I don't care.

That was also another bad day at the office. Sadly I am not the Tommy Lee Jones of the recruitment world, if I was my interviews would last 2 minutes and be something like this:

Tommy Lee Jones (Fast talking no pauses, shouting and in the candidate's face moving round them): You walk into a room and there is a bomb on the table, What do you do? The bomb has two wires, a battery, circuit board and some C4. What do you do? There is a blue, red, white and grey wire? Do something! The timer says 20 seconds, what do you do? Think!

Candidate: ermmm...
(one second later)
Tommy Lee Jones: Boom! your dead! Next!

Tommy Lee Jones: there is a bomb on the table...

Preparation, Preparation, Preperation

Muggins here was interviewing again, I was supposed to be having an administration day catching up on paperwork but I got dragged in.

Any recruitment person will tell you that one of the biggest mistakes you can make as a candidate is failing to prepare for an interview. There is probably only one scenario in which you would not need to bother with preparation. You must have done a similar job with a similar organisation for the last ten years and this is your tenth interview for a similar job in a similar organisation this week and even then I would still advise spending five minutes going over things in your head.

Thinking of candidates failing to prepare lead me to Tony Blair's famous speech of "Education, Education, Education" which he made to the labour party conference in 1996.

"Ask me my three main priorities for government, and I tell you: education, education, education."
(I could not find the full text of the speech but the quote is referenced from this BBC article)

My version therefore for prospective interview candidates is:

"Ask me my three main priorities for successful interviews, and I tell you: preparation, preparation, preparation."

-Zephyrist, 9th March 2007

Jobs are hard enough to get at interview without candidates self selecting themselves out by failing to prepare. I know I have been on that side of the table as well.

Now in a homage to Scrubs I am going to do a JD style summing up. Imagine some nice backing track while the scenes change from one character to the next with the following voice over:

"Some people prepare, some people prepare to fail, others fail to prepare. As for me, I just prepare for the best and worst that life has to throw at me."

Interviewing

Interviewing today, so for a change it was a good day, although there was a small matter of talking to children to deal with first.

The first interview of the day is always a bit of an unknown quantity. I usually start with a polystyrene cup of coffee in my hand praying to whoever might be listening that if they get me through this first interview, I promise to be good in the future. For the umpteenth time I whine in my head that yet again I have started the interviews as earlier as possible leaving myself a bit flustered.

Of course by this time I have fetched the interviewee or victim up from reception and made a bit of small talk while trying to remember which interview room I am using today. Then there is the fact that they don't know where they are going so they are constantly two paces behind me so I having to lean over my shoulder, make small talk and try to avoid tripping over my own feet as I plod up the stairs. Multi tasking the HR way, absolutely no chance with out a decent cup of coffee preferably filter possibly fair trade. Although I think the canteen hasn't yet heard of fair-trade yet, I am still trying to persuade them that black crunchy bacon described as crispy is possibly against the trade descriptions act.

So anyway the candidate is now lost in the block I call home to the point where I could take them back to the front door and say the interview panel is just through here and then kick them out back into the fresh air. After some interviews I sometimes think that the candidate would have preferred that quick death rather than the slow laboured lingering death rattle that they suffered at interview.

In the room its time to get comfy, unfortunately, for the candidate we use chairs which are mini sofas. You have the choice of almost reclining horizontally and coming across un-interested or leaning forward and intimidating the interviewers. I am never really that intimidated but there have been some nasty incidents when I thought the candidate was going for my coffee. Difficult decisions for the interviewee but I am still wondering whether I can survive the interview without a refill.

On to the questions and contrary to popular belief I have not judged you yet, I wait till after we have marked the questions, bit traditional I know. Then I judge you and when weighed in the balance you may come out wanting or you may not but it will be your answers in the next 30 minutes that will decide.

Onto the questions, we have some standard ones like strength, weaknesses, what would your colleagues say about you, tell me about yourself etc etc. Every answer different, but I am still somewhat amazed that otherwise intelligent people have not practised the answers. If you don't get these right you stand no chance with the section two questions. I know its a bit hard to get your head round the idea that there are standard questions but do you think we have a questions department, Noel Edmonds moonlighting with interview questions out back.

Section 2 "What if" questions. Usually by this time I am starting to pay attention unless you have sapped my will to live in part 1. If you have potential but seem to be fluffing the answer I will try to help by asking follow up questions. Little tip any follow up question must have an answer I don't waste valuable air in asking trick questions.

So there you are sitting in front of me, you have no idea what I am thinking and I have no real idea what your thinking, and somehow we still have half an interview to get through. If I am unlucky the section 2 questions turn into an applicant monologue. What you think is a thorough, concise answer actually translates into a long rambling answer where the interviewer starts to catch ever third second.After the interview the members of the panel have to reconstruct your answer from scrappy notes like a jigsaw. "I have an edge with a small dog", "Oh I have the dog's ball". Well you get the idea.

If your good and I am lucky you will breeze through the "What If's?". You have done your research, you are smarter than the average bear and you are actually vaguely interested in the job.

Then my final job is to close it "Do you have any questions?". Sometimes said with a sigh as I finally put you out of your misery and let you relax or sometimes with a prayer that you don't get out your small list you prepared early and ramble on for another thirty minutes.

All done. Time to go, collect up your stuff and I take you back through the maze, taking you down the same corridor twice just to see if you notice. More small talk, "how did it go?...yes you did seem a bit nervous...was it your first interview..what are you doing for the rest of the day? and so on.

Back to the door and it feels like I kicked you out of the door into the cold cruel world knowing that behind closed doors I am discussing your fate and giving you the gladiatorial thumbs up or thumbs down.

Actually I am just on my way to get a refill on the coffee and quickly read up on the next applicant and decide whether I need to probe a bit further on anything on their CV.

Then the second becomes the third, are we on the fourth / fifth, is it lunch time yet ?. Sixth rolls on to seven drags through to eight and we arrive at the bun fight.

The bun fight is where everyone on the interview panel starts throwing buns around, or having scored everyone, if as usual there is no clear winner we start arguing minor points. She has solid customer service experience, ah but this one had good team leader experience, yes but he didn't answer this question well.

Finally members of the panel start to group together and in the end it starts to narrow down until you have two people to choose from. I know and the rest of the panel knows they could both do the job and we have no evidence to suggest who would be the best for the company, we are not psychic. So the panel sits and argues, and at this point I am usually huddled quietly round a coffee hoping the the line managers will agree on something, anything please. So I sit, wait and watch for a kink in the argument, some small point of difference or promise. I throw the hat into the ring and make a decision, if they go my way we take that applicant, if they disagree with me we take the other applicant. If they dither I threaten them with interviewing another 8 people next week, strangely enough no manager has every dared take my offer.

Secretly, when we get down to the final two I sometimes just want to flip a coin, it will make no difference in the long run. Or make a decision and appoint both to learn who was the better candidate and what we missed at interview. It becomes a sliding doors moment, two futures, two paths, this decisions changes the world. Well it might do, prove me wrong.

Then I rewind the tape and start over, but this time all the actors and all the stories are different but the coffee reassuringly remains the same.

Please Note: Although the above may come across as cynical, it could not be farther from the truth. I hope I am a friendly interviewer and try to help people wherever I can and even if they are not suitable I endeavour to offer some constructive feedback.

I love interviewing and would happily do it day in day out. I never get tired of people and all the different stories and approaches they have.

Recruitment, Life and Death Decisions

Whilst doing some assessment centre work recently I was doing my usual second thoughts process of watching people.

One of the ideas of this particular brand of recruitment centre is that as they pass each stage we tell them the result.Obviously as it becomes more involved in the later stages it becomes really serious. When I was telling some of the candidates that it was time to go home I was crushing their dreams, they had almost not considered failure and who was I to tell them it was all over.

A "No" in these situations will remain a "No" and the only thing I can do is spend some time with them explain any feedback and de-brief them. For some it is still a great shock and disappointment.

My day consisted of going from "No" candidates to "Yes" candidates, so one minute I would be watching a face go from worried to full beam smile, and the next worried to despair.

Now that is not a good description of how the candidates were taking these decisions, so I came up with an analogy to describe the reactions.

Dead Cat / Resuscitated Cat

The idea is that instead of telling them Yes / No I can tell them a story to get the same reactions. Here are my two stories:

Dead Cat

I am sorry but your cat has died, there was nothing I could do.

Resuscitated Cat

Your cat is going to be fine, the operation was a complete success and we have managed to save her. She will be running around in no time.

I can imagine the reactions on the peoples faces would be the same that I have seen.

Of course the amazing things is the very variety of reactions that I get, especially when I tell them they have got the job offer. Some people barely react and it is always difficult to tell whether they are just really cool headed people or whether what I am saying has just not sunk in yet.

I guess it all goes to show that we are all individuals.

On another note if I were feeling like creating myself a new job title maybe I should call myself the "Death of Cats" making decisions of life and death.