This is an interesting picture I found through Stumble.
The title is "Most famous men in one photo". There are two things wrong with this title, firstly that there are women in the pictures and secondly it is not a photograph.
Those pedantic points aside it is a fascinating picture. Even if the first thing you do is count how many famous people you recognise rather than just appreciate it as a piece of art.
II Waging War
13 & 14 With this loss of substance and exhaustion of strength, the homes of the people will be stripped bare, and three tenths of their income will be dissipated; while government expenses for broken chariots, worn out horses, breast plates and helmets, bows and arrows, spears and shields, protective mantles, draught oxen and heavy wagons, will amount to four-tenths of its total revenue.
Notes by Zephyrist:
We were talking about the proximity of an army which causes prices to go up and this in turn causes the people's substance to be drained away.
Sun Tzu is talking about basic economics, demand increases whilst supply stays the same so prices rise. Peasant incomes don't increase so 30% of their income just vanishes as it is used to pay for the price rise in food.
The second part is that a standing army will cause defence spending to rise to 40% of the government's revenue.
How applicable these figures are in today's economic climate is debatable and perhaps the figures Sun Tzu quotes are too vague to analyse
An interesting article from the BBC magazine about whether "misspeak" means lying or just just being misinterpreted or unclear speech.
This follows on from Hilary Clinton making a speech referring to a visit to Bosnia in 1996 and afterwards being caught out by video footage which seemed to give a different version of events than Hilary herself gave.
Hilary's version
"Her initial version of events was that her plane landed under fire and she had to duck and run to her vehicle."-BBC Article, Does 'misspeak' mean lying?
"But television footage shows her disembarking with a smile, waving to the crowd and strolling across the tarmac to greet a little girl who read her a poem."-BBC Article, Does 'misspeak' mean lying?
Yes 9pm GMT on BBC1 the apprentice with Alan "Your fired" Sugar is back. Less than an hour to go till the cuddly rottweiler is back.
I have seen a trailer for the series which includes some suited and booted woman proclaiming that "I am the best salesperson in Europe".
Actually, I can prove your probably not.
For one how do you measure 'best salesperson'? On sales, most product sold, highest margin, largest commission. How are you comparing across industries, do you take into account factors such as customer satisfaction number of product returns or customer call backs.
If you were the best sales person you would probably be richer than Alan Sugar and the best sales person probably lives to do one thing and that is "Sell, Sell, Sell!". They would not have time to appear on the apprentice, think of the customers escaping un-serviced.
I know this because I once worked for a retail company with a heavy commission structure. I spoke to some managers who had worked their way up and were committed salespeople. My question was if you have made £2000 in the first hour of an eight hour day and had beaten your target do you put your feet up? They gave the answer of a true salesperson "I try to make £4000 in the second hour". True salespeople are always chasing the golden sale, and when they have the golden sale they need to beat it. They are truly competitive.
So are you likely to be the best salesperson in Europe. NO!
Do you have an ego that far exceeds your ability? Yes - Congratulations your on 'The Apprentice!'
Of course the biggest satisfaction in 'The Apprentice' is seeing people that have made it such as Alan Sugar take a big chain saw and cut the ego driven wannabes down to size.
There is an application on facebook called "Owned - Buy and sell your friends."
I am now owned for the princely sum of $151 by a complete stranger.
There is something slightly unsettling about this online slavery. On one level it is a simple popularity contest to see who has the better pictures or who is wanted more.
There is no real money involved, it is just credits which you can earn by playing the game. Ownership I assume confers no rights on the new owner.
Still just a little bit scary isn't it.
Update:
Bought a female friend for a $1 as a joke, only for someone else to buy her. Then two people entered into a bidding war and she quickly shot up to over $8000.
Far too scary now, deleted and blocked the application.
These are absolutely fascinating. I first saw an example of these sculptures in New Scientist magazine.
Basically just as a pixelated picture is made up of single pixels of a certain colour, Devorah makes up sculptures out of spools of thread of a single colour.
As Devorah says in the New Scientist article (17 March 2007, pp 52):
"As a visual artist I cannot think of a topic more stimulating and yet so basic than the art of seeing"- Devorah Sperber
Well fleeting snow showers have been reported all over England yesterday and today. I have seen two sleety / snow showers but nothing substantial.
There was even a report from our foreign correspondent yesterday of snow in South Wales.
The weather warnings from the met office have been 'be prepared' for Saturday and Sunday. The one for Saturday has now been downgraded to normal. In Oxfordshire there is a 60% chance of a severe disruption event resulting in up to 2-5 cm local accumulations at low ground or 5-10cm on high ground.
There is snow on the pitch, they think its all over, it is now!
Watch this space for the final exciting climax to the snow watch 2008 season.
I accept no responsibility for the humour in the following article. A lot of people will already know that I can find amusement in the smallest things, others would suggest my mind is not wired the same way as other people.
Finding Nemo ...
Found him!
It reads, "Nemo Me Impune Lacessit"
Which means "None provoke me unpunished."
I feel the game could be extended to any photo where the word nemo is clearly visible. I may play this later with my camera phone.
Can I Speak to Mr C Lyon
This is a very clever practical joke from the book "Penguins Stopped Play - eleven cricketers take on the world" by Harry Thompson which I can highly recommend.
Basically you track down the telephone number of a zoo and leave a message on a work colleagues desk that a Mr C Lyon rang while they were away could they please ring them back on this number.
Unless you are particularly bright you would ring the number and only when somebody said something like "London Zoo" you would twig. Of course some people might still ask to speak to Mr C Lyon (Sea Lion if you haven't twigged yet) in which case their colleagues are probably now even rolling around on the floor. In my office we have some one who would probably continue to argue that a Mr C Lyon did ring from that number.
As a HR professional I feel obliged to point out that practical jokes could be interpreted as bullying and harassment in the workplace. Make sure the person you are playing the joke on has a sense of humour otherwise you could find yourself facing disciplinary action.
One of the things I have always thought rather sad and strange is the way the Americans pledge allegiance to their flag. I find it rather curious that they should feel the need to have such a public pledge to unity of the country.
Its almost as if they do it as a test to see who is un-american, anyone not pledging to the flag is clearly un-american and not one of the ubiquitous us. Quick fetch your pitch forks and flaming torches and lets chase them out of town.
Anyway today saw the punt of an idea for British school leavers to have a citizenship ceremony which may or may not include a pledge of allegiance to the country and/or the Queen.
Lets give this one a miss shall we, we don't need to make an empty public gesture. After all we don't need to establish that everyone pretends to be British. Teenagers will either rebel or just pretend to get it over with. It wont give them pride in their country or give them a greater understanding of what it is to be British.
If I was being particularly cynical I might even suggest that this has nothing to do with being British it is just appealing to the illusive middle class voter who in deepest Surrey will hear the news and say what a good idea it is and about time to.
In a quiet moment on a wet Monday while the "Great" storm was raging against the window. In Oxfordshire it really wasn't that great, more of the "Lesser" Storm.
Anyway I was busy watching the rain and thought about writing all the stories that from a working life spent in HR. If it is still called HR when I retire in 30 ish years time. Who knows whether I shall ever write the scary story that is my life in HR but it amused me for five minutes to think about titles for my magnus opus.
" The story of a mid-level HR functionary in a non-descript government department"
" Re-inventing the wheel - the public sector way"
"I came I saw, I banged my head against the wall."
"Have you filled in the correct form?"
"101 reasons why you shouldn't have a meeting"
"Even a 6 year old can see the problem"
"To change the world, you have to start at the bottom."
"My life in procedures and policies."
"Every day heroes and how I recruited them."
"HR - Hope Revitalised"
"HR - Harpies Re-visted"
"HR - Hopeful Revolution"
"When the call came, I stood up and was counted."
"Cradle to grave HR in the public sector."
I could go on and on. Perhaps I could make them into chapter titles instead.
Well looking at my notes for last year, there is little hope left for any snow fall this season.
Last year there was a final blast on the 22nd March which gives us just 14 days to go.
Will the proverbial white rabbit fall out of that or is that the end of a one snowflake season.
Bah Humbug.
Have you ever been in a meeting where there are perhaps ten or twelve of you round a table, maybe you and a few team colleagues together with management / clients / customers? Perhaps you are having a pivotal discussion about the future. You need to be in sync with your team to carry the day.
How cool would it be to have an in-house sign language to give your team pointers or more info about what you are thinking. The bonus would be you could have a subtext conversation below the main conversation but one where only your team understand it.
You might want to sign things like:
"I don't agree with them"
"I agree"
"We need to support this idea"
"We need to close this idea down"
"I need your support"
"Lets wrap this up"
"I think we need a break"
"We need to negotiate on price"
"This is going nowhere"
" We need to get back on track"
You wouldn't need a whole new language just about 20 or so key phrases to help out during the meeting. After all organisations already invent their own verbal and written languages, how about inventing an organisational specific non verbal language?
Well I saw my first real snow flakes this morning. Following on from a report by a field reporter in South Oxfordshire of white rain I saw the odd flake in Oxford this morning. No pictures as if you had blinked you would have missed them.
Ah well. Hopes for a fine Snow Watch 2008 season are fading fast and it all started so well all the way back in December 2007.
Forgot to say what I did notice with the quake is that for the print media it is tomorrows news. So their front pages were probably just finishing the print run when the big story of the day happened.
Another day where print media seems sadly helplessly behind the times. However, in their defence their analysis, editorial and commentary will be so much better than the digital versions.
Maybe it is time for newspapers to go weekly, I would be more inclined to buy one.
Earthquake felt across much of UK (BBC)
For those of you unaware today there was a minor earthquake in the UK, for people from earth quakes zones it was a minor quake of only 5.2 on the richter scale. For the UK this is a big one, we only get one of these once every thirty years.
Of course the public and the media especially got all excited.
The quake happened just before 1 am and it woke me up. I am about 130 miles away from the epicentre of the quake. I could sense the room moving from side to side and stuff or the building rattling in the roof space.
The immediate thought was that it was an explosion like the Bunsfield oil one or an earthquake. I kind of decided it was a quake and then tried to remember what you did in a quake, stand under a doorway or get outside. This took about ten seconds to think about and then it stopped.
Electricity Still on.
All quiet, no immediate danger.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. I went back to sleep.
I am now off to fill in the British Geological Society Earthquake questionnaire on my experiences, contribute to the scientific understanding of Earthquakes in the UK.
Should you be happening to be in Alpha Centuri posting home a postcard it may well be a mistake to post a letter to Earth.
After all there must be some hierarchy such as the name of the solar system and then the number of the planet away from the local star.
So it would be better to post your cards to 'Sol-3' (local name:Earth). After all that is how they seem to name planets in tv shows like star trek so why isn't earth known as Sol-3.
Ladders
On my way to work this morning there was a ladder leant across the pavement against a wall. Rather than walk under the ladder I walked into the road and around it.
I would not class myself as superstitious although my previous paragraph would contradict me. I believe I'm just not someone that risks looking for trouble. There is enough to worry about in life than going looking for something extra. After all maybe the superstition about ladders is due to the number of things that drop on peoples heads as they go under the ladder.
As far as I can see best to minimise the risks and not take the chance.
Appraisals
Yes, its that time of year again when I write the work of fiction entitled "What I did at work this year". The annual appraisal is upon me again. The workplace is alive with works of fiction that could outsell some of the latest paperback novels.
Appraisals the system that was bought in to replace favouritism by bosses, so now the good writers among us can make up rubbish have it signed off by the same boss, but not there couldn't possibly be any favouritism, performance is all evidenced in the appraisal.
If you believe that, can I interest the emperor in a new pair of trousers. Cloth so fine you can barely see it (OK you cant mainly because it doesn't exist).
The reason I loathe the appraisal system is because linking it to performance pay they give everyone the dream that they could get a better pay rise than everyone else. In reality 90% of us get exactly the same pay rise but to compound it all you get the same grade as someone who barely turns up to work and everyone complains about. Whilst you beaver away getting the job done and enjoy moderate success.
Even worse about the appraisal at our organisation is that it has been refined to such management speak terms that no normal person can understand it but if you dare criticise the system you are an enemy of the organisation and clearly not a team player.
I call it the more cheese system, I turn up to work, complete my appraisal and press the button for more cheese. The system sees that I have pressed the button and rewards me with a small piece of cheese. Lucky me I am a fully trained organisational rat.
I have only two ways of subverting the system:
1) make the whole process hell for my manager, whine, moan, complain and drop in quotes about more cheese. This works quite well, although clearly I have to forfeit any chance of getting a superb grading in my appraisal although to be fair the chances of getting anyway was non existent.
2) After the appraisal has been signed off and the rating signed off there is a final comments box where I am allowed to put anything I want. (insert evil laugh here)
This year I am thinking a quote, maybe something by Ray Bradbury:
"There was always a minority afraid of something, and a great majority afraid of the dark, afraid of the future, afraid of the past, afraid of the present, afraid of themselves and shadows of themselves."
"If they give you ruled paper, write the other way."
"When our time is up,When our lives are done,That would be a good sentiment to end on,
Will we say we've had our fun?
Will we make a mark,
This time.
Will we always say we tried. "
...
"All the love I've met,
I have no regrets,
If it all ends now,
I'm set."
...
"Standing on the rooftop,
Waiting till the bomb drops,
This is all we've got now,
Scream until your heart stops,
Never gonna regret,
Watching every sunset,
Listen to your heartbeat,
All the love that we've felt."
...
"When our time is up, When our lives are done, Will we say we've had our fun?"
Your current income level:
Under £25,000
£25,001 to £35,000
£35,001 to £50,000
£50,001 - £100,000
£100,001 - £200,000
£200,01 - £300,000
Over £300,000
Any statistician will tell you that creating categories must be meaningful, so that you get an even spread of items over each category. Which would suggest that a good proportion of ex-students earn more than £25,000.
These categories prove 2 things:
1. Going to university clearly leads to higher salaries.
2. I am not quite in the same league as many of my fellow graduates, ho hum.
This is not only interesting to HR people but everyone in the workplace. According to a CIPD news article in the 7 February 2008 People Management, the definition of what defines belief has been broadened.
"...the definition of belief to include any strongly held belief that affects an employee's lifestyle. This may include environmental concerns."
Well last week turned into a big non event, not unusual in the UK snow season. At one point the met office were predicting a 40% risk of severe disruption with up to 5 cm of snow in low lying areas. That quickly vanished and in the end not one snow flake was seen in Oxfordshire.
Anyway somebody asked why I do Snow Watch.
1. Its a scientific historical record of snow in Oxfordshire, for instance I know now in 2007 that the first snow fall of the year was on January 22nd.
2. I am still a child when it comes to snow, I used to live in the south west by the coast when I was a child. I saw an inch of snow twice in 18 years. In Oxfordshire where it pretty much snows every year I love every minute of it.
3. There is something magical about it, Walking while it is snowing, makes the world clean, dampens all the sounds including the traffic and you can make your own path in the snow and see where you have been. Tell me that isn't magical.
Admittedly if you have somewhere to go urgently or drive its a nightmare but sometimes you should stop and appreciate the beauty that is snow. It is a unique piece of nature and should be appreciated.
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