Weston Otmoor eco-town

There has been so much about government eco-towns lately and one is unfortunately quite near me.

The whole concept is a bit misleading, the cynical part of me things that the government identified new towns as a possible solution to the housing shortage but realised that a simple 'new town' concept would never be accepted by the general public. That kind of idea is just so 1960's. So anyway bring in the bright spark consultant being paid far too much money who says I know lets make it green, some kind of energy efficient, public transport utopia. If you objected to that kind of thing you must be mad.

Hence just as labour became new labour so new town became eco-town.

Anyway the developer who is really only in it to make money has started off the public relations war. The consultants who drew up the websites and the initial consultation paperwork have so much spin they should work for a washing machine company.

Before we continue I would like to first outline my position on eco-towns. I think the concept of a new town is wrong, we don't need new towns we need to expand and revitalise old towns and villages. If I had to call my concept a reality it would be eco-estates or eco-villages. There are lots of existing towns and villages in prime locations which could be expanded sensitively to improve the local area without overwhelming it.

I agree wholeheartedly with the "eco" concept but I think these develops underestimate the lure of the car. However good the public transport network is people will always use the car, especially in places like Oxfordshire.

Now to deal with the Weston Otmoor design and feasibility.

1. Location

An eco town placed at a major motorway junction. If it really is supposed to encourage you not to drive how is that going to work. You would be 2 minutes drive from the motorway / A34 which would give you the best road connections in the entire of Oxfordshire (even if it would be a slow moving car park). How does this encourage people to use public transport?

The access toll road to the town may encourage people to leave the car at home but it does depend on how high the toll is and whether it outweighs the benefits of taking the car. This will not affect people who commute to London.

On their website the developer happily say that only 6.5% of the land is on green belt which allegedly busts a myth that green fields will be carpeted with concrete. Hmmm, that may be strictly true because over half of the development would be on an airfield which is probably class as industrial land. However the airfield is a grass airfield used for parachute drops, it is not a major international hub and it is a very green field.

The design allows for a nice High street just off the A34. Nice, I think I will be getting into my car and driving to Oxford or Milton Keynes.

2. Transport

One of the big things they are pushing is the tram network with a stop only 300m from your door, although your car will only be 10m from your door and ready to go when you are.

The East West rail link will be rebuilt allowing high speed train access to London, Oxford and Milton Keynes. Again with high speed access you could live their and work in London.

3. Industry

They will be able to attract some industry to the eco town. Probably either office or commercial space or research industries who like the proximity to the university and other research sites in Oxford.

However there is no need for these to be sited here, you could equally and more sustainably build these in several locations around Oxfordshire. There are already new plans to build a business park in Bicester.

4. The Consultation questionnaire.

I think this questionnaire might have loaded questions, even though you can tell I strongly disagree with most details of the eco-town idea it turns out that out of 12 questions I strongly agree with 9 of them. Funny that.

Alternatives:

My concept would be the eco estates or the eco extensions. In terms of location the 15000 houses would be spread round the county. There possibly is scope for a smaller development around Weston-on-the-green. Other developments could be centred around existing small towns and villages. West Oxfordshire is prime for developing especially around the Oxford to Worcester railway line. Other locations could include Bicester, Banbury and Didcot. There would also be scope for major extensions along the east west rail route particularly in the Bicester, Aylesbury and Milton Keynes triangle.

Conclusion

The concept is fairly flawed but not completely without merit in some better locations it may even work.

However to suggest that 35,000 people can be put right next to the best connected road junction in Oxfordshire with access to the capital by rail will turn into a flourishing non car using town is naive. Weston Otmoor will turn into a dormitory town with just as much car use as everywhere else.

How to kick start an economy - the American way.

The US government have decided that the best way to boost the economy is to get the American public to spend more money. The Government has given each household a tax rebate, in many cases worth hundreds of dollars.

The new scientist* reports the findings of two scientists who suggest the plan is unlikely to have much impact. They took 140 students and asked them how they would spend various amounts of money. Students offered a $600 payment said that on average they would spend just $113, however if they received the payment in 12 monthly payments they would spend $420.

Other criticisms can include that the majority of recipients will either save the money or use it to pay off existing debts. Neither actions pumping the money into the economy. The final criticism is of course that it will hurt the government increasing national debt and lowering spending reserves.

All in all probably an inefficient way of spending tax dollars and breathing new life into the economy.

On a personal note I would agree with the findings of the study. If you gave me a lump sum I might pay off some debts or spend half of it on something nice and use the other to pay off debts or save it. If you gave me 12 payments I would not really notice it and just use it to up my general standard of living.

*This has been well publicised in the general media, but I don't have a link at the moment. However as a reference I can give you the New Scientist article which covers the story and Research. The Article "People of America: spend more of your money!" can be found in the 7 June 200 issue on page 15.

Salary converter - convert annual to hourly, weekly, daily or anything

My new site is all done. The salary converter I made ages ago now has its very own home on the internet. SalaryConverter.co.uk

You can convert salary between any of the following annual, monthly, four weekly, daily and hourly.

Very useful for job hunting especially as a temp where everyone quotes different rates.

Prince Caspian - 'The Call' - Regina Spektor

I happened to catch the second Narnia film, Prince Caspian. It was good, some great dialogue, good music and some lovely set piece battles. You can tell it is done by the same team as Lord of the rings. It has very good cinematography, some lovely scenes.

I guess the people who are going to see this are the people that grew up with the books or remembers the tv adaptions etc. Well worth going to see if you liked the first one. I am even looking forward to the next one.

Without ruining any of the plot the end sequence is just perfect. The video below has some well chosen stills but I don't think it gives a great deal away but if you want to watch the film first please do so and feel free to come back.

This song is the final end sequence and titles song, a very haunting melody.

"And then that word grew louder and louder
'Til it was a battle cry"

"No need to say goodbye, you will come back when its over..."

10 things the labour party could do for the UK

Running on from the last post about the labour party not having any decent ideas for ages here are 10 things they could do to really shake things up.

1. Reinstate the 10% starting rate in tax and lower the upper tax rate to compensate

2. Increase tax duty on homes over £500,000

3. Lower Fuel duty and tie it to oil price. When and if the fuel price drops the tax goes back on.

4. Have a sensible binge drinking policy. Don't charge me more just because other people are irresponsible.

5. Integrate public transport, introduce a national 'oyster' smart card and forces all public transport companies to sign up as part of their public licence to operate.

6. Deal with railways, allow greater open access and competition across routes. invest in new rolling stock and infrastructure. Commit to building at least one high speed line.

7. Open up major funding and subsidy schemes for proven renewable technologies. Put a solar panel on every roof in the UK. Encourage community energy projects in water mills, solar power, wind power, biomass generation and implement a national grid strategy to develop a distributed energy generation grid.

8. Create a centre of excellence for renewable energies. Make a UK renewable research centre and commit to bringing new technologies to market.

9. Find a way to deal with crime effectively, bring it a 3 strike rule. Lock people up in more prisons but fight better ways to fight social integration and offender rehabilitation.

10. Make it easy for first time buyers and penalise second home owners.

Feel free to turn any of these ideas into policies.

New Labour = Are they thick or what?

Excuse my language but really I am beginning to think that Labour are trying to get kicked out of office.

There all useless, I thought I would never say it but since Tony Blair left office I don't think they have had one good idea between them. The Tories must be rubbing their hands with glee, they could start burning books and they would still get elected at the next election just because the entire electorate is now completely bored.

Labour has gone past incompetent into territory where no government has been before.

Harriet Harman is the latest new labour muppet to trot out a 'new terrible, potentially frightening missing the entire point' law.

The new equalities act which among other things will allow employers to positively discriminate and with two equally qualified candidates choose the ethnic minority candidate or female candidate over the white male.

Luckily it can work both ways, if white men are under-represented then they can be selected in preference. However in all practicality who would do that?

It is usually at this point in the article that I point out the over reaction of the media or that the legislation actually does a whole load of other things but I feel very strongly about positive discrimination.

I feel the only way to combat discrimination is not only to outlaw negative discrimination but also positive discrimination. Allowing positive discrimination will convince some organisations that negative discrimination can somehow be justified, after all they are just making up for the other organisations that positively discriminate, redressing the balance as it were.

The biggest problem I have with positive discrimination is that it does nothing to address the underlying issues of society and why in some organisations ethnic minorities and women are under represented. Positive discrimination may get them into the organisation but if the culture isn't changed then they will soon be leaving again. Meanwhile you have alienated all sorts of people for not having a level playing field.

What about sectors which are already female dominated. HR is getting to the levels where the women are in the clear majority. There is still a legacy of very senior male HR managers but most of the middle rank is predominantly female. At the lower scale there are some male administrators but again predominantly female. As each year goes by the sector becomes more female dominated. In fact the profession does not even recognise that it has got a diversity issue among the very people who set policy for everyone else.

Will we see positive action recruitment and programmes for men in HR? I doubt it.

Harriet Harman uses the police as an example of why positive discrimination would be a good idea. The Metropolitan police have had targets for years and consistently failed to recruit the number required to meet the targets. They have openly campaigned to be able to positively discriminate in recruitment. There have been equal accusations of both positive and negative discrimination in their recruitment policies from recruits.

This is a very organisational solution to a problem, ignore the root causes and go for the simple solution. Positive discrimination is the equivalent of saying leaves keep getting into the building so lets cut down all the trees in a five mile radius where actually all you need to do is keep the door shut and get someone to sweep the leaves out once a day.

Just because it is hard to establish the reasons for discrimination and a gender pay gap doesn't mean we should not try.

I think a lot of problems stem from the secrecy around salaries, using an economic concept in a market where everyone had complete knowledge of the system then if a company did discriminate and did not pay market rates then its employees would just leave.

Having moaned for half an hour one good thing about the legislation is that it does merge all the previous equality legislation into one new bill.

Mark Easton's BBC Blog raises some more interesting points about equality and particularly about the poor prospects for the white male and some more evidence on why positive discrimination doesn't address the actual causes of the gender pay gap.

I hate to do it but I will give the last word on the legislation to the Tory party,

"This bill should seek to unite not divide. It has good intentions but its lack of detail and clarity is disappointing..."

-Theresa May MP

Beaver 1 Devon Stream 0

One of the cuter stories in the paper today is the first beaver dam in 800 years. Of course tomorrow the beaver will be installing the first beaver hydro-electric power station.

Of course with a beaver story / picture you can spend hours making up captions or "Sun" headlines.

So good work that beaver, keep up the hard work, today a stream in Devon, tomorrow the English channel.

Hard to reach customer groups

I was in an interesting meeting the other day with our new advertising agency. I wasn't supposed to be attending as I wasn't supposed to be at head office and the meeting was only vaguely connected to my work. It was about recruitment but a different project.

As I was at a loose end I popped along, it was a good opportunity to size up the agency contacts on something I didn't necessarily care about.

The interesting thing was that the whole meeting was about how to reach a customer group we don't normally reach. We as an organisation recognised this groups impact on our business and recognised that the way we normally advertise i.e in local media, didn't reach them.

Another good point was that the project team had determined that the best way to determine the key messages for this group was to talk to a focus group of these customers.

After that it went down hill, the group decided that they didn't have the contacts and couldn't afford either the time or money to make the contacts.

The project team then set about assuming what the key messages were and that print media still worked as it did last year with a different customer group.

At this point another colleague pointed out that we had already decided this approach hadn't worked, so why were we resurrecting it, they pretty much got blank looks.

So I weighed in, pointed out it was a different customer group and there was no reason to suggest that approach would work, so why would we waste money.

There was a good ten seconds of blank looks including a staring contest with a senior manager.

You cant win them all ... I am looking forward to the traditional print campaign which achieves nothing not because it was the wrong approach just because the customer group is hard to reach. The really annoying thing is by that time nobody will remember the conversation that the key thing was to talk to the customer group before deciding on the message. My mate Sir Alan would have sacked several of the muppets present in the room.

Is it me or is the first step to talking to your customers actually finding a customer and talking to them.

Seriously, how hard is it?

Dear Steven Spielberg

***Spoiler alert for Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008) ***

Dear Steven Spielberg,

Overall I think you did a good job on the new Indiana Jones film if you accept that it is a sentimental nod towards an 80's childhood when the first three films came out.

However, I can't help thinking that the film could be improved upon, it has the potential to be the blockbuster it should have been but there were some key aspects that could be brushed up.

Firstly, it was very nice to see that Harrison Ford still has it, I was getting worried in the first half hour as he looked more like he needed a walking stick than a whip but once the bullets started flying he was off like a whippet. What was nice was that he had matured gracefully since the original films, his humour had got a bit sharper and he had grown softer with age.

If I am honest after watching the whole film I found the first 20-30 minutes of the film pointless. It was too slow, a bit unrealistic and was just a mediocre start to the film. If you go for a directors cut my advice would be to start the film where Dean Charles Stanforth has to resign because of the communist witch hunt. Perhaps a two minute intro of news headlines and video footage for the era could set the scene for Indiana being suspected of being communist.

That way you also get straight into the action, the car and motorbike chases were pure Indy territory. Although it was a bit odd that they needed a big chopping machine to get through the jungle, yet when that was destroyed there was basically a three lane jungle motorway to drive along and the road surface was so good that the characters could have a stand up sword fight between vehicles where they were busy worrying about their stance. However, Indiana Jones movies are about suspending disbelief up to a point so I was prepared to let that slip.

What was also odd was that Indy's whip was not ever present. Stuck in a sand pit sinking down with over hanging trees what should the hatted adventurer reach for. His whip clearly, but no he has to wait for his son to throw him an obviously rubber snake. Steven are you really saying that was the only way you could get a snake into the film.

Finally I should move onto the plot. An Indiana Jones film doesn't have a complicated plot, you need good guys, bad guys, an object which everyone is after, a love interest and then some natives.

You went for a poor plot involving aliens. I cant help thinking you were confusing mysticism and legend with science fiction. Indy does mysticism and legend but not science fiction. The alien plot was just pointless and lead to a slightly unbelievable ending.

The love interest was definitely missing, ok so having indy's old flame was good but you could have given the son a love interest.

The natives did not really have any plot connections, they just seemed to be there as an extra obstacle for the adventurers. Where was the human interest aspect of the plot, another part sadly missing.

Other lame aspects of the plot included the Russian villian wanting to know everything, the double / triple agent rubbish, the valley within waterfalls, the surviving the nuclear explosion in a fridge and the swinging through the forest.

The basic concept of the plot is where you have a formulaic plot, in the new film you need to follow the formula.

I could go on but think I will leave it there. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull has the makings of a good film but it could have been so much more.

Yours Sincerely,

Zephyrist.

PS If you need an executive director for the next new Indy Trilogy please do not hesitate to drop me a line.

Burma - 18 days on

18 days on.
78, 000 dead.
56,000 missing.
2.4 million severely affected.
Only 25% of people needing aid being reached.

Naked facts about a horrific natural disaster made worse by human inaction, human pride, human ignorance and human failings.

18 days on and people still die while idiots talk.

I, like others have tried to comprehend or find some understanding in this. Why do the Burmese military Junta refuse to openly accept all the aid that can get into their country. They must know that people are dying because of their decisions.

Humanitarian Emergencies are not about politics, or pride or national / regional boundaries they are about saving lives, helping people and restoring basic services.

Are the Burmese leaders too proud too accept help. Would it cause them so much dishonour to recognise that they need outside assistance? Can that really be what prevents them from acting.

Leadership is often about making the hard decisions, about not being afraid to focus on the end game. Sometimes its about the end justifying the means, its can be about breaking rules. For the Burmese military leadership should be about recognising we need all the help we can get. Call in all the favours and all the debts, accept every bit of charity because our people need help now.

If there is a fall out from such Western involvement it can be dealt with later. There is no honour or pride in 78,000 dead.

Just one vote

Here is logical / illogical premise.

Only one person needs to vote in a UK parliamentary election to elect an MP. Democratic principle can be exercised by just one person.

Proof:

In any election there is essentially only a winner and a loser, in most election only two candidates are in serious running for the win. Therefore anybody that votes for the also runs need not bother voting.

Which leaves two candidates and their voters. Now if candidate X gets 20,000 votes and candidate y gets 23,200 voters then the net win is 3,200. So in fact the forty thousand votes than can be paired in the end don't matter so they can stay at home as well.

Now whether you win by 3,200 or 1 doesn't make any difference you don't get bonus points. So really 3,199 voters might as well save their legs as well.

Just one person needs to go out and vote to elect the new member of parliament.

The trick is identifying the one person.

Sun makes apology to police community support officers

There was a story about two PCSOs who allegedly stood by and did nothing while a lad tried to rescue his sister.

Here is the balanced BBC story of the inquest Police defend drowning death case.

I cant find the original sun story but would guess it wasn't that ethical.

Anyway the full Sun retraction is here and I am happy to reproduce it to ensure that it gets the widest possible audience. PCSOs come in for a lot of stick and such negative accusations are not positive for society in general.

"OUR reports on the inquest of Jordon Lyon who drowned trying to rescue his sister (September 2007) stated two Police Community Support Officers from Greater Manchester Police stood by and did nothing.

We wish to clarify the two PCSOs arrived after Jordon disappeared under the water and they summoned help and directed other emergency services to the scene.

We apologise for any distress our report may have caused."

-THE SUN

Maybe if we start publishing such retractions widely on blogs we can undermine the credibility of the gutter press and stop the culture of publish today, print a small retraction tomorrow.

The media should be held accountable for what they publish and encouraged to act with responsibility as we all know retractions afterwards mean nothing once somebodies reputation has been ruined.

Many thanks to "The Plastic Fuzz" for bringing the retraction to my attention. I shall be keeping an eye on this blogger.

Another House MD remix video

I started looking through videos on you tube some of the mixes are great, some world class directing going on.

This one is set to 'How to save a life" by The Fray, which is an excellent song. Watch out for the perfectly planned and executed piano sequence.

The Future is Bright, the Future is Nano (BBC)

Sometimes you read a news item and you get a feeling this could be the start of the next internet, the small piece of news that will change the world beyond all recognition in years to come.

This is one of those pieces, researchers have built the worlds smallest transistor just 1 atom thick and 10 atoms wide made of a new super material Graphene which is a single layer of graphite (the same stuff in your pencil). You really cant get much smaller than that.

Even better it is a UK research group doing the work from the University of Manchester.

Essentially Graphene will one day replace silicone and is anticipated to be even better than silicon especially in the nanometre range.

Dont expect to see the first Graphene products just yet. The researchers still have to find an efficient manufacturing process and scale it up. It will be at least another 10 years before we start seeing our first products but to be fair they only discovered it four years ago.

I shall leave the last words to Professor Bob Westervelt who was assessing the material and its future applications in the journal, "Science".

"The future should be very interesting"

The "Credit crunch"

The story of the "credit crunch" continues. Twelve months ago it wasn't even a phrase.

Here is my little diagram of the main players, it looks like the consumers are trapped in some dodgy little pyramid scheme and in some respects we are. In a blamestorm (a blame equivalent of a brainstorm) everyone would be found to be at least partly responsible. The other issue is trust, all of the players are closely connected and any exchange in money is based on trust.

To examine the credit crunch more closely we have to examine the concerns and motivations of each party:

Bank of England:

Main concerns: Inflation is now at 2.5%, over the government target and although the interbank credit markets lack fluidity the bank doesn't want to be seen as bailing out past poor financial decisions.

Options: Interest rates cannot be adjusted sufficiently to boost confidence, the risk of rampant inflation is too high. It is likely the Bank of England will have to offer longer term loans or take risk onto its books to increase confidence.

Lenders:

Main concerns: Avoid going bankrupt and reduce their risk dramatically. Spread the blame and get a bail-out from the government.

Options: Reduce risk, find compromise with Bank of England over longer term loans. Learn from their mistakes, leave risky mortgages to specialist companies.

Government:

Main concerns: Win the next election, give the consumer what they want without storing up problems for the next five years.

Options: Reduced since the Bank of England were made independent (A very good thing). Spread the blame to the banks and consumers suggest that their hands are tied while lobbying for other parties to sit round the table.

The government may be able to look at stronger regulation for the financial services or increase funding for home owner schemes to add buoyancy to the housing market.

Consumers:

Main concerns: running out of money fast with inflation, poor pay rises and being heavily extended on credit. If not on the housing ladder now, absolutely no chance. If on housing ladder fears of a market crash and negative equity.

Options: Re-finance debt and lobby for changes to the banking system. If they have over extended themselves learn that the economy can go down as well as up and that no one will come bail you out.

Summary

Somehow we need to regain confidence in the banking system I would expect the Bank of England to make more loan money available to lenders over longer terms. Hopefully, all lenders will learn not to take as many risks.

Consumers will loose out, credit that was available will not be extended to the same extent. Everyone now accepts that lenders made some dubious decision and took on too many high risk loans. This is partly the consumers fault for over extending themselves, just because a lender offers you money doesn't mean you should take it.

For the property market using simple demand / supply economics. Demand will fall especially at the lower end of the market as it is the first time buyers that prop up the market. This will then cascade up. However, supply may also fall which may lead to a stabilisation of the property market.

Best guess is the property market will go through a structural re-alignment, we may see a fall before it stabilises at just below or near inflation growth. Falls will be lower at the bottom end of the market, even with credit restrictions I would anticipate that demand for first houses will still outstrip supply.

When it comes down to it I feel blame lies with both the lenders and the consumers. No one thought that the economy would have a hiccup, we built our finances on a house of cards, when one fell so did all the others.

Surveillance and council spying (BBC)

There have been several interesting news stories this week. This one caught my eye because it is another example of a story that can be twisted depending on which media outlet is telling the story. In my opinion the BBC article is a fair balanced view, although some of their tv coverage has been more sensationalist.

The sensationalist version is that a local council has used terrorism surveillance laws to monitor whether a family were telling the truth about where the live.

The instant reaction is how much of an over reaction that is by the council, a misuse of legislation and yet another example of how the UK is turning into a police state. You can read or see all of the above in different parts of the media.

I even heard 'police state' mention by a commentator on BBC News 24. Which if you read many of my articles you realise that such a comment would be opinion passing itself off as news, which in itself is misleading and inaccurate. Especially if you don't know the political leaning, previous commentary on issues.

I digress slightly about commentary but what I am suggesting is if you have prior knowledge of the commentator you have an idea of how to treat their comments, if you like assign a credibility value. For instance hypothetically, Jeremy Clarkson and Sir Ian Blair make the comment that speed cameras are ineffective in reducing road deaths. If Jeremy Clarkson says it you know he is mouthing off as he always does, as he is a world renown speed enforcement hater. However if Sir Ian Blair says it you treat it with a bit more respect as presumably you trust his opinion more.

This of course assumes you are able to rationalise facts and don't hold the completely opposite view that Jeremy Clarkson is a genius and Sir Ian Blair is a fool. If you do, think of what you might think if Jeremy Clarkson said that you should keep to the speed limits at all times and Sir Ian Blair said the same.

Anyway, the point is if you don't know a bit about the commentator how can you make a judgement of credibility on an isolated comment. So John Brown comes out and says that speed cameras are ineffective. The question should be why is he saying that, what's his background? The danger with unknown commentators is we make a quick judgement, if they affirm our beliefs then they are right, if they don't they are clearluy biased or insane.

Surely we should be willing to explore whether they are right or wrong, but unfortunately the media don't always give us that opportunity.

I digress, we were talking about the use of RIPA laws and survelliance.

First we need to know what RIPA is supposed to be used for. According to the home office website RIPA is

"The Regulation of Investigatory Powers Act (RIPA) legislates for using methods of surveillance and information gathering to help the prevention of crime, including terrorism."

Do not focus on the buzzword of terrorism, it is about preventing crime. Basically and I am not a legal expert it legislates the use of surveillance and information gathering when a criminal activity is suspected. My understanding is that you have to have reasonable suspicion of a criminal offence taking place to be granted rights to conduct surveillance.

If we take the surveillance that this article talks about, the council suspects that the family may be making a fraudulent claim and giving a false address. We don't know exactly what information they had but maybe they had two address on file, or the family had provided documents with a different address. Presumably the council must have had some evidence for the RIPA to be granted. Agencies are not allowed to conduct surveillance with out a RIPA application unless they have an immediate need which prevents them from submitting an application.

If you are interested you can look at the seven page application they would have had to submit. It includes questions on whether it is intrusive or proportionate to the need. It is also submitted from a senior officer, in the form the suggestion is senior department head which again suggests that internally to the council a number of people would have reviewed the request.

This application is then reviewed and approved I would assume in a similar way to the police applying for warrants to search premises.

In other words given that the RIPA was granted it should follow that the approach by the council was appropriate and responsible.

Although criminal activity was not proved the family openly admit they resided at the address within the catchment area and then moved out after the deadline had passed. Depending on how you look at things this could still be considered fraud or not in the spirit of fairness to other families.

The BBC article mentions similar surveillance by the council. In the three cases the council investigated two other families had their places withdrawn. This limited statistical evidence would suggest that the council applies the policy fairly, investigating only those where fraud is suspected.

Certain parts of the media may suggest that anything less than a 100% is unacceptable however if this were the case I would be more suspicious that the council is letting people getting away with it. If you were using a better known police comparison you would not suggest that a 100% of suspects arrested were guilty.

On a final note the final quote from a teaching union representative that if you ask people what there address is they will tell you the truth is a bit naive. If people really want something they will lie or in their eyes bend the truth, the families concerned probably don't consider what they are doing as wrong just playing the system and they would suggest that the end justifies the means.

In summary we should be celebrating that such cheaters are being investigated and glad that such regulation is in place to control surveillance. Instead of calling the UK a 'police state' given that this story suggests that minor fraud is endemic across the population then the UK could be said to be a 'nation of cheaters'.

Newsflash: Snow Falling

There is more snow in the air this evening, as of now snow is falling, no sign of settling yet.

One final blast of winter

I woke up this morning to find that winter had left one last blanket of snow to dampen spring's ardour.

Yes, just as spring had started Old Man winter blows down from the north once more.

This is the only significant snow fall of the season and although by the time I was out and about it was well on its way to melting I would estimate that almost an inch of snow fell last night.

Here are the only decent pictures of snowfall this Snow Watch 2008 season taken this afternoon in mid melt.



Snow hiding in the shadows of the mini standing stones.















Check out the interference on the roof tops, I think it is moire or something, the roofs were not wavy.







Some of the trees looked like they had been in a battle with a snow cannon and lost.

House MD

I think House is great, well written and compulsive viewing. House is your standard grumpy genius but you just cant help respecting and admiring him even if he would be hell to work with. However although he would be hell to work with you would go on to great things after leaving his team as you would have learnt so much. House challenges and inspires his team and although it may not seem obvious he is a great leader and mentor.

In HR terms House is difficult to manage as everyone around him knows. House is the loose cannon that doesn't play by the rules and thus can not be treated the same way as every other employee. To a certain extent I suspect that kind of person enjoys bending the rule in the name of doing what is right.

I am a bit House like, I don't toe the party line and I will challenge anything I don't agree with. Many will disagree but I am not in it to make friends and be nice to everyone I am in it to do what is right.

Anyway one episode of House started with a song called Desire by , someone on Youtube had put together a nice video of clips which I thought I would share with you.



I went looking for other remix videos to the same tune about House MD, here is another good one.



For the record the female doctor is lovely and I know in one episode they go on a date but I am not sure if it works out, I suspect not. However House definitely needs his head read on that subject because I would love to take her out to dinner.

Same song different show, this time it its Josh and Donna from the "West Wing", another couple that are great together. Whoever cut this video was a genius although to be fair the original script was also done by a genius.

Wait for the bit where she goes over and sits next to Josh, cross her legs. Josh says" Do you want another drink?" Donna say, "No" and gets up and walks off. Its hot, flirty seductive stuff. We are in bite lip sexy territory here.
Again I would have to say if Donna was available I would taker her to dinner too.



Which leads me to a Josh and Donna West Wing Quote

Josh: If you were in an accident I wouldn't stop for beer.

Donna: If you were in an accident I wouldn't stop for red lights.

What makes these videos good is the dynamic between the two characters and the long lingering looks and secret smiles.

Envelope Psychology: 'See you soon' or 'See you later'

Question:

What do you most often say, or which of the following phrases would you use?

"See you soon."

OR

"See you later."

Theory:

Which phrase you use or choose says something psychological about your personality. Well it might do, I am not sure but this is my notes from the back of the proverbial envelope.

See you soon.

You have a nurturing personality. Usage of this phrase suggests an emotional attachment to the subject and it acts as a reminder both to you and them that you care. This is predominantly but not exclusively use by females who tend to be more emotive in their language. It also suggests that you fully intend to see them and may already in your mind be making plans to do so.

See you later.

You have a more pragmatic, practical personality. Usage of this phrase is slightly dismissive in that the meeting is at an end but we will meet again later at some unspecified point which is not guaranteed. This is predominantly but not exclusively used by males who tend to be more pragmatic in their language. It does not suggest that a further meeting is expected and certainly no thought has been given to a future meeting but such a date may already have been arranged or will be in the future.

Disclaimer:

I base the above on limited anecdotal evidence but I am open to a debate of the issues. I myself use "See you later" and know at least two female friends who always use "See you soon". I realise this is not conclusive evidence but it did make me pose a theorem.

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Most famous people on one picture"

This is an interesting picture I found through Stumble.

The title is "Most famous men in one photo". There are two things wrong with this title, firstly that there are women in the pictures and secondly it is not a photograph.

Those pedantic points aside it is a fascinating picture. Even if the first thing you do is count how many famous people you recognise rather than just appreciate it as a piece of art.

The Art of War by Sun Tzu

II Waging War

13 & 14 With this loss of substance and exhaustion of strength, the homes of the people will be stripped bare, and three tenths of their income will be dissipated; while government expenses for broken chariots, worn out horses, breast plates and helmets, bows and arrows, spears and shields, protective mantles, draught oxen and heavy wagons, will amount to four-tenths of its total revenue.

Notes by Zephyrist:

We were talking about the proximity of an army which causes prices to go up and this in turn causes the people's substance to be drained away.

Sun Tzu is talking about basic economics, demand increases whilst supply stays the same so prices rise. Peasant incomes don't increase so 30% of their income just vanishes as it is used to pay for the price rise in food.

The second part is that a standing army will cause defence spending to rise to 40% of the government's revenue.

How applicable these figures are in today's economic climate is debatable and perhaps the figures Sun Tzu quotes are too vague to analyse

Does 'misspeak' mean lying? (BBC)

An interesting article from the BBC magazine about whether "misspeak" means lying or just just being misinterpreted or unclear speech.

This follows on from Hilary Clinton making a speech referring to a visit to Bosnia in 1996 and afterwards being caught out by video footage which seemed to give a different version of events than Hilary herself gave.

Hilary's version

"Her initial version of events was that her plane landed under fire and she had to duck and run to her vehicle."

-BBC Article, Does 'misspeak' mean lying?

News footage version

"But television footage shows her disembarking with a smile, waving to the crowd and strolling across the tarmac to greet a little girl who read her a poem."

-BBC Article, Does 'misspeak' mean lying?

I can see how easily you would mix up the two visits.

Anyway the debate is that misspeak can mean lying or misinterpreted, so her use of the word is very ambiguous. IS she just avoiding political suicide by not owning up and saying she was lying.

The article suggests that if pressed about whether she actually lied, then she can admit to lying and say she never tried to deny it, even though she hasn't really said outright that she lied.

There are some other examples of 'misspeak' especially by other politicians including George W Bush and his famous enemies speech.

"They [our enemies] never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people - and neither do we."

- George W. Bush 2005 (BBC Article, Does 'misspeak' mean lying?)

Pilchard! (sorry PG-13 insults)

The Apprentice is back...

Yes 9pm GMT on BBC1 the apprentice with Alan "Your fired" Sugar is back. Less than an hour to go till the cuddly rottweiler is back.

I have seen a trailer for the series which includes some suited and booted woman proclaiming that "I am the best salesperson in Europe".

Actually, I can prove your probably not.

For one how do you measure 'best salesperson'? On sales, most product sold, highest margin, largest commission. How are you comparing across industries, do you take into account factors such as customer satisfaction number of product returns or customer call backs.

If you were the best sales person you would probably be richer than Alan Sugar and the best sales person probably lives to do one thing and that is "Sell, Sell, Sell!". They would not have time to appear on the apprentice, think of the customers escaping un-serviced.

I know this because I once worked for a retail company with a heavy commission structure. I spoke to some managers who had worked their way up and were committed salespeople. My question was if you have made £2000 in the first hour of an eight hour day and had beaten your target do you put your feet up? They gave the answer of a true salesperson "I try to make £4000 in the second hour". True salespeople are always chasing the golden sale, and when they have the golden sale they need to beat it. They are truly competitive.

So are you likely to be the best salesperson in Europe. NO!

Do you have an ego that far exceeds your ability? Yes - Congratulations your on 'The Apprentice!'

Of course the biggest satisfaction in 'The Apprentice' is seeing people that have made it such as Alan Sugar take a big chain saw and cut the ego driven wannabes down to size.

Facebook just got scary

There is an application on facebook called "Owned - Buy and sell your friends."

I am now owned for the princely sum of $151 by a complete stranger.

There is something slightly unsettling about this online slavery. On one level it is a simple popularity contest to see who has the better pictures or who is wanted more.

There is no real money involved, it is just credits which you can earn by playing the game. Ownership I assume confers no rights on the new owner.

Still just a little bit scary isn't it.

Update:

Bought a female friend for a $1 as a joke, only for someone else to buy her. Then two people entered into a bidding war and she quickly shot up to over $8000.

Far too scary now, deleted and blocked the application.

Devorah Sperbler - pixelated abstract sculptures

These are absolutely fascinating. I first saw an example of these sculptures in New Scientist magazine.

Basically just as a pixelated picture is made up of single pixels of a certain colour, Devorah makes up sculptures out of spools of thread of a single colour.

As Devorah says in the New Scientist article (17 March 2007, pp 52):

"As a visual artist I cannot think of a topic more stimulating and yet so basic than the art of seeing"

- Devorah Sperber

The Science bit is appreciating how our minds process visual information and put it all together to from an image. The idea is that the sculpture makes us think about how the brain interprets the world around which may not be quite the same. The brain could be said to be playing tricks on us, in the same way that movies are still pictures but our brain processes them into moving pictures.

The world is not always quite as our eyes see it.

Snow Watch 2008

Well fleeting snow showers have been reported all over England yesterday and today. I have seen two sleety / snow showers but nothing substantial.

There was even a report from our foreign correspondent yesterday of snow in South Wales.

The weather warnings from the met office have been 'be prepared' for Saturday and Sunday. The one for Saturday has now been downgraded to normal. In Oxfordshire there is a 60% chance of a severe disruption event resulting in up to 2-5 cm local accumulations at low ground or 5-10cm on high ground.

There is snow on the pitch, they think its all over, it is now!

Watch this space for the final exciting climax to the snow watch 2008 season.

Finding Nemo and a Practical Joke

I accept no responsibility for the humour in the following article. A lot of people will already know that I can find amusement in the smallest things, others would suggest my mind is not wired the same way as other people.

Finding Nemo ...


Found him!

It reads, "Nemo Me Impune Lacessit"

Which means "None provoke me unpunished."

I feel the game could be extended to any photo where the word nemo is clearly visible. I may play this later with my camera phone.


Can I Speak to Mr C Lyon

This is a very clever practical joke from the book "Penguins Stopped Play - eleven cricketers take on the world" by Harry Thompson which I can highly recommend.

Basically you track down the telephone number of a zoo and leave a message on a work colleagues desk that a Mr C Lyon rang while they were away could they please ring them back on this number.

Unless you are particularly bright you would ring the number and only when somebody said something like "London Zoo" you would twig. Of course some people might still ask to speak to Mr C Lyon (Sea Lion if you haven't twigged yet) in which case their colleagues are probably now even rolling around on the floor. In my office we have some one who would probably continue to argue that a Mr C Lyon did ring from that number.

As a HR professional I feel obliged to point out that practical jokes could be interpreted as bullying and harassment in the workplace. Make sure the person you are playing the joke on has a sense of humour otherwise you could find yourself facing disciplinary action.

I do not pledge allegiance ...

One of the things I have always thought rather sad and strange is the way the Americans pledge allegiance to their flag. I find it rather curious that they should feel the need to have such a public pledge to unity of the country.

Its almost as if they do it as a test to see who is un-american, anyone not pledging to the flag is clearly un-american and not one of the ubiquitous us. Quick fetch your pitch forks and flaming torches and lets chase them out of town.

Anyway today saw the punt of an idea for British school leavers to have a citizenship ceremony which may or may not include a pledge of allegiance to the country and/or the Queen.

Lets give this one a miss shall we, we don't need to make an empty public gesture. After all we don't need to establish that everyone pretends to be British. Teenagers will either rebel or just pretend to get it over with. It wont give them pride in their country or give them a greater understanding of what it is to be British.

If I was being particularly cynical I might even suggest that this has nothing to do with being British it is just appealing to the illusive middle class voter who in deepest Surrey will hear the news and say what a good idea it is and about time to.

My Autobiography - Possible Titles

In a quiet moment on a wet Monday while the "Great" storm was raging against the window. In Oxfordshire it really wasn't that great, more of the "Lesser" Storm.

Anyway I was busy watching the rain and thought about writing all the stories that from a working life spent in HR. If it is still called HR when I retire in 30 ish years time. Who knows whether I shall ever write the scary story that is my life in HR but it amused me for five minutes to think about titles for my magnus opus.

" The story of a mid-level HR functionary in a non-descript government department"

" Re-inventing the wheel - the public sector way"

"I came I saw, I banged my head against the wall."

"Have you filled in the correct form?"

"101 reasons why you shouldn't have a meeting"

"Even a 6 year old can see the problem"

"To change the world, you have to start at the bottom."

"My life in procedures and policies."

"Every day heroes and how I recruited them."

"HR - Hope Revitalised"

"HR - Harpies Re-visted"

"HR - Hopeful Revolution"

"When the call came, I stood up and was counted."

"Cradle to grave HR in the public sector."

I could go on and on. Perhaps I could make them into chapter titles instead.

Snow Watch 2008

Well looking at my notes for last year, there is little hope left for any snow fall this season.

Last year there was a final blast on the 22nd March which gives us just 14 days to go.

Will the proverbial white rabbit fall out of that or is that the end of a one snowflake season.

Bah Humbug.

Meeting sign language

Have you ever been in a meeting where there are perhaps ten or twelve of you round a table, maybe you and a few team colleagues together with management / clients / customers? Perhaps you are having a pivotal discussion about the future. You need to be in sync with your team to carry the day.

How cool would it be to have an in-house sign language to give your team pointers or more info about what you are thinking. The bonus would be you could have a subtext conversation below the main conversation but one where only your team understand it.

You might want to sign things like:

"I don't agree with them"

"I agree"

"We need to support this idea"

"We need to close this idea down"

"I need your support"

"Lets wrap this up"

"I think we need a break"

"We need to negotiate on price"

"This is going nowhere"

" We need to get back on track"

You wouldn't need a whole new language just about 20 or so key phrases to help out during the meeting. After all organisations already invent their own verbal and written languages, how about inventing an organisational specific non verbal language?

Snow Watch 2008

Well I saw my first real snow flakes this morning. Following on from a report by a field reporter in South Oxfordshire of white rain I saw the odd flake in Oxford this morning. No pictures as if you had blinked you would have missed them.

Ah well. Hopes for a fine Snow Watch 2008 season are fading fast and it all started so well all the way back in December 2007.

The Quake and the media cycle

Forgot to say what I did notice with the quake is that for the print media it is tomorrows news. So their front pages were probably just finishing the print run when the big story of the day happened.

Another day where print media seems sadly helplessly behind the times. However, in their defence their analysis, editorial and commentary will be so much better than the digital versions.

Maybe it is time for newspapers to go weekly, I would be more inclined to buy one.

The day the earth shook and then I went back to sleep

Earthquake felt across much of UK (BBC)

For those of you unaware today there was a minor earthquake in the UK, for people from earth quakes zones it was a minor quake of only 5.2 on the richter scale. For the UK this is a big one, we only get one of these once every thirty years.

Of course the public and the media especially got all excited.

The quake happened just before 1 am and it woke me up. I am about 130 miles away from the epicentre of the quake. I could sense the room moving from side to side and stuff or the building rattling in the roof space.

The immediate thought was that it was an explosion like the Bunsfield oil one or an earthquake. I kind of decided it was a quake and then tried to remember what you did in a quake, stand under a doorway or get outside. This took about ten seconds to think about and then it stopped.

Electricity Still on.

All quiet, no immediate danger.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. I went back to sleep.

I am now off to fill in the British Geological Society Earthquake questionnaire on my experiences, contribute to the scientific understanding of Earthquakes in the UK.

Postal Code for earth

Should you be happening to be in Alpha Centuri posting home a postcard it may well be a mistake to post a letter to Earth.

After all there must be some hierarchy such as the name of the solar system and then the number of the planet away from the local star.

So it would be better to post your cards to 'Sol-3' (local name:Earth). After all that is how they seem to name planets in tv shows like star trek so why isn't earth known as Sol-3.

Ladders, Appraisals and funerals

Ladders

On my way to work this morning there was a ladder leant across the pavement against a wall. Rather than walk under the ladder I walked into the road and around it.

I would not class myself as superstitious although my previous paragraph would contradict me. I believe I'm just not someone that risks looking for trouble. There is enough to worry about in life than going looking for something extra. After all maybe the superstition about ladders is due to the number of things that drop on peoples heads as they go under the ladder.

As far as I can see best to minimise the risks and not take the chance.

Appraisals

Yes, its that time of year again when I write the work of fiction entitled "What I did at work this year". The annual appraisal is upon me again. The workplace is alive with works of fiction that could outsell some of the latest paperback novels.

Appraisals the system that was bought in to replace favouritism by bosses, so now the good writers among us can make up rubbish have it signed off by the same boss, but not there couldn't possibly be any favouritism, performance is all evidenced in the appraisal.

If you believe that, can I interest the emperor in a new pair of trousers. Cloth so fine you can barely see it (OK you cant mainly because it doesn't exist).

The reason I loathe the appraisal system is because linking it to performance pay they give everyone the dream that they could get a better pay rise than everyone else. In reality 90% of us get exactly the same pay rise but to compound it all you get the same grade as someone who barely turns up to work and everyone complains about. Whilst you beaver away getting the job done and enjoy moderate success.

Even worse about the appraisal at our organisation is that it has been refined to such management speak terms that no normal person can understand it but if you dare criticise the system you are an enemy of the organisation and clearly not a team player.

I call it the more cheese system, I turn up to work, complete my appraisal and press the button for more cheese. The system sees that I have pressed the button and rewards me with a small piece of cheese. Lucky me I am a fully trained organisational rat.

I have only two ways of subverting the system:

1) make the whole process hell for my manager, whine, moan, complain and drop in quotes about more cheese. This works quite well, although clearly I have to forfeit any chance of getting a superb grading in my appraisal although to be fair the chances of getting anyway was non existent.

2) After the appraisal has been signed off and the rating signed off there is a final comments box where I am allowed to put anything I want. (insert evil laugh here)

This year I am thinking a quote, maybe something by Ray Bradbury:

"There was always a minority afraid of something, and a great majority afraid of the dark, afraid of the future, afraid of the past, afraid of the present, afraid of themselves and shadows of themselves."

"If they give you ruled paper, write the other way."

Ray Bradbury quotes on wikiquote

I will chose between the two although the second quote from Fahrenheit 451 appeals to my sense of humour.

Funerals

The talk at work a while back was of funerals, the bit that stuck in my mind was about the choice of music. Its not something we like to think about but occasionally such talk leads us to wonder what we would like. These days pretty much anything goes from traditional hymns to rock ballads.

I would like a mixture of both. I would like to start with the hymn "For those in peril on the sea", I love the coast, never liked being on the sea, cant really swim much but its a good tune. Other hymns might include "Abide with me", "Guide me o though great redeemer" or if near Christmas I could quite go for an ironic sing along of "God rest ye merry gentleman".

If we are going modern I quite like rooftops by lost prophets preferably at architecture wobbling volume with massive bass bins.

"When our time is up,When our lives are done,
Will we say we've had our fun?

Will we make a mark,
This time.
Will we always say we tried. "
...
"All the love I've met,
I have no regrets,
If it all ends now,
I'm set."
...
"Standing on the rooftop,
Waiting till the bomb drops,
This is all we've got now,
Scream until your heart stops,
Never gonna regret,
Watching every sunset,
Listen to your heartbeat,
All the love that we've felt."
...

That would be a good sentiment to end on,

"When our time is up, When our lives are done, Will we say we've had our fun?"

University alumini - update your details form

Your current income level:

Under £25,000

£25,001 to £35,000

£35,001 to £50,000

£50,001 - £100,000

£100,001 - £200,000

£200,01 - £300,000

Over £300,000

Any statistician will tell you that creating categories must be meaningful, so that you get an even spread of items over each category. Which would suggest that a good proportion of ex-students earn more than £25,000.

These categories prove 2 things:

1. Going to university clearly leads to higher salaries.

2. I am not quite in the same league as many of my fellow graduates, ho hum.

Being Green and employment discrimination (CIPD)

This is not only interesting to HR people but everyone in the workplace. According to a CIPD news article in the 7 February 2008 People Management, the definition of what defines belief has been broadened.

"...the definition of belief to include any strongly held belief that affects an employee's lifestyle. This may include environmental concerns."

Thus if you felt strongly about green issues, perhaps campaigned in the workplace for recycling and then were discriminated against over a promotion because of that campaign you could claim discrimination under UK law.

The advice as always is to ensure that all decisions taken are justified. So continuing with the example you would need to justify why the company could not recycle and also prove that the promotion decision was made objectively.

The best way to make recruitment / promtion decisions is always to have a structured interview.

Snow Watch 2008

Well last week turned into a big non event, not unusual in the UK snow season. At one point the met office were predicting a 40% risk of severe disruption with up to 5 cm of snow in low lying areas. That quickly vanished and in the end not one snow flake was seen in Oxfordshire.

Anyway somebody asked why I do Snow Watch.

1. Its a scientific historical record of snow in Oxfordshire, for instance I know now in 2007 that the first snow fall of the year was on January 22nd.

2. I am still a child when it comes to snow, I used to live in the south west by the coast when I was a child. I saw an inch of snow twice in 18 years. In Oxfordshire where it pretty much snows every year I love every minute of it.

3. There is something magical about it, Walking while it is snowing, makes the world clean, dampens all the sounds including the traffic and you can make your own path in the snow and see where you have been. Tell me that isn't magical.

Admittedly if you have somewhere to go urgently or drive its a nightmare but sometimes you should stop and appreciate the beauty that is snow. It is a unique piece of nature and should be appreciated.

Snow Watch 2008

Just as I thought there was no hope Sky news predicts a snow fall.

"Weather forecasters are warning of snow, blizzards and freezing winds for later this week."

Admittedly if you read the article further, for Oxfordshire and most of England it clarifies:

"Across the rest of the UK, scattered snow showers will bring slight to moderate accumulations to some places, although detail is uncertain at this stage"

Past experience has taught us avid snow watchers that such vague predictions can mean anything from no snow whatsoever to a good three inches.

The place to watch is the met office who are quiet at the moment but then again the snow is on the limit of the five day forecast, we cant really be expecting met office early warnings till Wednesday.

The BBC five day forecast for Oxford is suggesting sleet on Friday and then light snow on Saturday.

Watch this space but it would appear we may be under starters orders.

Celebrity meltdowns are we to blame (BBC)

You may have noticed Britney Spears having a meltdown all over the trashy end of the media. The BBC have written an article which basically asks whether we are to blame for this celebrity culture.

The expert they consult suggests that these are modern day fairy tales or morality tales. We can all look at these people and say that is what happens to you if you do X, Y and Z. A kind of internal verification that if you act irresponsibly you don't get a happy ending.

Are we kidding ourselves really? After all lots of people don't end up like Britney but are just as bad. The thing is they don't get caught out.

Are such stories a bitter pill designed to keep everyone else in there place. After all that is essentially what a morality tale is.

"But we also want to know what it's like to live to the point of destruction, to experience the thrill of it without actually having to do it ourselves, and that's where Britney and co come in."

- Phillip Hodson, a fellow of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy.

So basically we know the result and therefore do not need to carry out the experiment. Although there are some things that any normal person could work out from first principles. It is not rocket science is it.

"Britney is a victim of an exploitative industry, a sensationalist media, and a public who seem to enjoy voyeuristically the troubles of superstars and celebrities."

-Marjorie Wallace, Sane

Yes, sadly the public are guilty as charged. It is compulsive car crash compulsive viewing, you have to watch even though you know what is going to happen next.

What's the answer? There is none we need morality stories to show what happens when things go wrong, but does it really need to be headline news? Morality stories don't need to be current affairs, in fact the best stories live longer than the current news day.

Snow Watch 2008

Still no sign of snow, not even on the five day forecast. It seems unseasonably warm for mid winter but who knows what is round the corner.

Snow Watch 2008

Well so far all we have had in Oxfordshire is rain and lots of it. The problem with snow is that no one quite knows when it is going to turn up in the UK until a couple of days before hand.

The first snow in 2007 was on January 22nd, 2 days away but the weather in 2008 is far too mild and wet at the moment so the likelihood over the next week is for rain and not snow.

Its too earlier to say whether the 2008 will be a damp squib season after all this time month next month I may be reporting to you from the middle of a snow drift.

Shrapnel

Ok I have been busy counting out the small change ready to go to the bank. It is known as shrapnel, as it is the small coins that arrive back in your pocket after the big coins have been spent (exploded).

Now in the UK we have penny coins such as 1, 2 and 5. All of these are now pretty useless, they don't buy many things any more, they just weigh your pockets down.

If I were in charge I would probably get rid of 1p and 2p coins, after all there are billions of them just like mine sitting around in money boxes.

The other troublesome denomination is the humble fiver, have you noticed recently that more shops apologise for not having any fiver's in change and give you lots of coins or that the fiver's you do get are past their sell by date.

The reason is not that there is a national shortage, the Bank of England has millions just waiting to be issued, but that retailers and banks don't like the notes, they take up too much space. It may not be long until we see a £5 coin come into general circulation.

Of course even better would be to get rid of cash altogether but that seems just as far off as it has even been. Despite trials with mobile phones, charge up cards, chip and pin cards etc nothing quite seems to be able to replace cash in its entirety.

The other disadvantage to all this shrapnel is that it wears out the pockets on my trousers and even with the iron-on mending patch they are never quite the same.

From Banking to trouser pockets, it is a funny old world.

Littering- For **** sake people

Littering really annoys me, how hard is it for people to either find a nearby bin or take it home with you. There really is no excuse. You wouldn't do it in your own home so why do it in the outside world.

After all I bet you are the first to complain when your town is dirty, conveniently forgetting that it is people like you that made it so dirty in the first place.

The wombles of Wimbledon Common had it right, pick up your litter, reuse and recycle.

I have been reading 'Freakonomics' so I was thinking about the economics of littering.

The reason people litter is because there is effectively no penalty for littering, there is ineffective social pressure to litter and somebody will clear it up anyway.

Of course there is an indirect cost in the taxes we pay to clear up the mess, but again the non-litterer ends up paying just as much as the litterer. If you do the right thing you still cant avoid the cost.

Then how can we get rid of litter without imposing draconian punishments for those who litter. I think it is a question of ring fencing, set up a community litter team made up of people that litter. There will always be people to add to the team and they can then clear up their own mess.

Think about it a cash fine does not work because there is no chance of getting caught but 25 hours of boring litter picking will put you off if you get caught, and put you off if a friend gets caught and tell you about it.

Find me the teenager that would like to do 25 hours boring service like that, once a few got caught littering would so decrease.

Quick Joke

Usual disclaimer: If you don't find it funny, it was funny in my head, not all heads are the same.


Meanwhile on RMS Titanic in the dining room.

Waiter: Iceberg!!!!!

Diner: No, I ordered the mixed leaf salad.


What this joke really needs is a cartoon with the caption "Dave, hated it when the waiter got his order wrong, it really ruined his night."

Snow Watch 2008 - Leg 2 False Alarm

Well at least in Oxfordshire it may have been a false alarm. There were reports of isolated snow fall in Witney, Wallingford and Wheatly but I saw nothing.

The sky looks a bit snow-like but the weather warnings were withdrawn today and nothing seems to be on the horizon.

Leg 2 was indeed a false alarm unless there is some snowfall overnight.

Either way it is still early in the season and I am looking forward to what is shaping up to be an exciting snow watch.

Leg 2: The east wind takes to the field, snow is on the wind

The early start to the snow season continues with leg 2 predicted to start tomorrow a full 21 days earlier than last season's start.

The met office has issues a severe weather warning for 0600 Thursday 3rd January 2008 through to 0600 Friday 4th January 2008.

There is a 20% risk of disruption due to snow over Oxfordshire although some uncertainty over how much snow will fall and again how fast it will turn to rain. Note this is the risk of disruption not the risk of snow, the risk of snow is of course higher.

Watch this space and we will see what tomorrow brings.

The Review of 2007

Well a whole year of articles on the 'One mind, Many Thoughts' blog.

247 articles, many many pages. It all started with a quote

"It is only as we develop others that we permanently succeed"
- Harvey Samuel Firestone

It ended with a personal article about someone I met on a train and how it reminded me of the personal ads.

So what were some of my favourite articles of the year; political, internet links, Snow watch 2007 or comedy sketches.

It is difficult to just pick one article but if I had to pick one, just one where I was on fire, it would have to be one of the ones I wrote myself.

To be fair I am going to have to choose two, one that typifies my strange sense of humour and one that demonstrated my willingness to debate and dissect current affairs issues.

Random Thought: Horses and sheep

UK General Election May 2008 I choose this article because at the time when everyone was saying there would be a November 2007 election I said there wouldn't and with hindsight it turned out I was right. On an additional note May 2008 looks promising but it cannot be judged until nearer to the actual day, it all depends what happens in the first few months of 2008.

That was 2007, who knows what might happen in 200. Like I always say I don't know where I am going but it will be fun finding out.

The people you accidentally meet while travelling

I'm guessing a lot of people will know what I mean when I say sometimes when travelling but train or bus you meet somebody lovely. Usually it is me watching the man and woman who have just met talking like best friends for two hours but today on a First Great Western train from the West to Reading it was me.

One of those moments which you don't expect but are unmissable, possibly one of the moments in life which take your breath away.

I didn't get her phone number, I did see if she wanted a drink and although she said she was tempted she was on her way to a rugby match so had to decline. She flashed me a smile and was off.

While day dreaming my way through the rest of the journey I thought about the fairy tale lonely hearts where people say they saw someone on the train etc.

Specifically I was thinking of the impulse advertisements that have been running in the uk over the last two years. If you don't know what I mean here is one to watch.

So what would be my advert for today's little encounter, how about these two:

• Aspiring dress designer -
  

You had me in stitches.

• Train home girl -

You left tracks in my mind.

Pratchett and Vox Pox (Pops)

Christmas wouldn't be complete without the latest book from Terry Pratchett.

I can only add my best wishes to the many expressed in recent weeks now that it has been anounced the author has Alzheimer's.

Several articles I have written this year have touched about how everyone has a voice in the new media. They have such a strong voice that the non expert man or woman in the street are now more trusted and respected to give an opinion. I have made clear that this imbalance leads us to take advice from people who know little about the sometimes complex situations that occur.

After all if you want your boiler fixed you call a heating engineer. If you want to know about the Northern rock crisis you ask a financial expert.

Rewind a bit, If you want to know about the Northern rock crisis you ask people in a que who are scared and desperate to get there money back (rightly so given the lack of credible support by the government, not exactly helped by media doom mongering).

The best decisions can only be made with the best information, although citizen journalism opens up all the information making it available to every one it becomes harder to find the nuggets of information which are the truth.

In information terms we are potentially turning into lemmings all willing to jump on the latest band wagon. The people who shout the loudest and are given enough air time will be listened to. The new media is all about spin and not substance to the detriment of society as a whole.

Of course this may not be a problem, because experts have an agenda, they mislead the public at least if we all doing it, it is democracy in action.

The problem is citizen journalists also have agendas, unlike experts they have no reputation to loose if they are found to be wrong, they can hide behind different screen names, groups and accounts. If it all goes wrong you will find them blaming someone else, they take no blame or liability they were only expressing what everyone was saying or thinking.

The media in turning us away from the establishment is leading us into a very large, very dark, very scary mine field. You can ask the non expert what happens if you go into a mine field without a map, no need to track down an expert for this one.

Terry Pratchett in his latest book has hit on a very apt description for all these Vox Pops you see in newspapers, news tv and online. (I renamed it Vox Pox because it is more like a disease)

"...Vox Pops - which meant people in the street who didn't know anything told other peole what they knew - and lengthy articles by people who also didn't know anything but could say it very elegantly in 250 words."

Making Money 2007, Terry Pratchett.

Something I could really use right now

You would be forgiven that I might be in desperate search of aspirin to cure the over indulgence of Christmas. You would be mistaken, instead I am looking for something to save me from the repetitive adverts from the likes of B & Q, Debenhams and PC World.

Unless you have been on another planet since Christmas Eve (in which case lucky you) every television advert has been full of the delight of the post Christmas sales. Several companies have gone for the brain washing technique of playing repetitive adverts again, again and again, until the entire advert is seared into the back of your eyes.

It has reached the point where I feel the need to buy something, anything just to make the adverts go away. Surely such adverts are outlawed under the Human Right Acts, surely such repetitive brain washing could be described as a 'cruel and unusual form of torture'.

There would be a market for a widget attached to your TV, which if you scanned a recent receipt from the said company the TV would play soothing pictures of animals at play or some other screen saver type advert instead of the insistent screaming to 'buy, buy, buy' before time runs out.

There has to be a research paper in this somewhere. Even if I ask my readers to name without thinking 3 retail organisations that have a sale starting after Christmas with massive bargains.

It seems to have paid off as well, on the news I heard several retail managers drooling over the fact that they were finding it difficult to pack in any more people into their stores on boxing day.

Anyway with this alternative seasonal message I wish all my readers best wishes of the winter festival and happy new year.

Journeys into the West

It is the time of year when I take a journey from Oxfordshire to Devon via First Great Western.

It is always nice to see what has changed for the better or worse since the last time I let the train take the strain.

The Adelantes are still around although apparently not for much longer. They don't appear to be well liked by travellers but I have always found them to be very comfortable.

From Reading to Exeter St Davids was on a refreshed FGW HST. It is not a bad job the new seats are comfy and not too cramped and the décor has been modernized. The only minor criticism I have is the choice of door colour, it is a bright lurid pink. I personally the old double yellow line colour they used to have. I suspect that the pink doors will date very badly and in a year or so will look very dated.

Exeter St Davids and you would have thought you had stepped back into the 1980's. There were dozens of Class 142 Leyland bus type trains hanging around. These were used after the end of loco hauled services in the 80's but were soon moved out of the region due to excessive wheel wear and track damage.

Having done a bit of research it would appear FGW have bought them back mainly because they are dirt cheap and because they simple don't have anything better. It appears that although Network rail were not impressed with the move they allowed the stock move after certain assurance were put in place by FGW.

Anyway these Class 142 pacers were effectively made from British Leyland bus parts for the cheapest possible costs. To take the suspension as an example they are two large spring on each bogie set. The ride quality is not that great. The interior is also very bus like with large bus seats and bus doors.

All in all a 1980's train which should have been scrapped at the end of the 80's. The ride quality is terrible, there are no interior comforts and by all accounts the reliability is poor as well. Typical first great western go for cheap and ignore the customers. Why the government continues to allow them to treat customers like dirt is unbelievable.

I should also mention that they do not perform well in a crash, imagine crushing a tin can. The report after a crash in 1999 recommended they should be phased out because of this.

Whichever way you look at it these trains should not be running in 2007.

Rumour has it FGW does intend to refurbish the units but other than recover the seats and fill the worst of the holes there is probably not a lot they can do.

Public Sector Pay Reviews

The government has been busy insisting lately that all public sector pay reviews should be kept to as near the 2% target inflation level as possible. The cold hard logic is that because there are so many public sector workers the more money they are given, the greater the inflationary pressure.

The first problem with this is that it doesn't reward workers in the public sector. In fact really given that other inflation figures are higher including the RPI index at 4.0% it probably gives anyone working in the public sector a pay cut. So not only are public sector workers under appreciated with less job security they must now take a pay cut year on year.

The second problem is that it is a very short term knee jerk reaction which does not make economic sense in the long term.

Lets start with a premise which we can all agree on and then apply the New labour policy to see what happens.

Premise:

We want a public sector which rewards and values employees. In doing this we recognise we will not be able to compete on salary but workers will not be penalised simply because they work for the greater good.

We will treat employees as individuals encouraging innovation, recognising that a strong capable workforce will mean a strong Great Britain

New Pay Scheme:

No salary settlement to be higher than lowest rate of inflation.

Implications:

• Differential between Public and Private sector increases in the same way that the differential between house prices and earnings have increased
• Employee motivation decreases, if salary does not change employee become priced out of the economy (eg housing) and so have to seek promotion on a new grade or move to the private sector. Staying in the same post is not a viable option.
  
• Low paid jobs attract poor employees who cant compete for average jobs. There is a tendency for public sector employers to hire or retain poor employees rather than have no one in post.
• Low paid jobs cannot be filled, greater reliance on temps which cost up to X1.5 more.
• Employees who remain in the same post for their career i.e. police officers, paramedics decide to leave the industry.
• Organisations cheat: they award pay rises outside of the annual payment to keep employees effectively negating any economic effect the annual policy has.
• When employee leaves, the job cannot be filled, the salary is then regraded to a salary which the old employee would have liked but was not allowed. So the public sector is willing to pay more for a new person with less experience. The policy does not retain employees.
  
• Public sector will never be world class. You get what you pay for, you pay third rate wages you get third rate service.
• The average employees suffer, these pay settlements don't effect the fat cats only the front line staff.

In reality you may save money by restricting salary growth but you end up paying more in hidden costs and your public sector improvement / reform policies suffer.

Public sector pay as an economic tool is a blunt instrument. There is an argument for making sure that things don't get out of hand by applying a cap or by phasing large pay rises. However, the bottom line is that the policy does not treat people as individuals.

There are much better ways of managing the economy without penalising a section of society who choose to give up private sector wages for the greater good.

Virgin Cross Country franchise demise

On November 11th several operators disappeared from the UK railway network in the latest round of franchise quick shuffle.

One of them was Virgin Cross Country. I have travelled on them quite a few times and they operated some of the busiest routes. They were busy because of Virgin's investment in the franchise with new trains, new tickets / pricing and marketing.

At the start of the franchise commentators said you could not move a Virgin brand on to the railways because the railways are slow, boring and expensive. Things that have never been part of the Virgin brand.

Critics said putting the Virgin brand on track could only ever bring the rest of the Virgin group down.

However, the critics were wrong the Virgin Cross Country brand prospered. It was certainly a hard journey and things could have gone better but it was a success. So with a successful popular operator you would have thought they stood a good chance for keeping the franchise.

Sadly this was not to be and Virgin Cross Country left the scene on November 11, 2007.

I have always felt that brands like Virgin keep the competition honest. Virgin puts quality and value above profit, Virgin stands for customer commitment which cannot be said for a lot of other brands in the transport industry such as First and their terrible franchise First Great Western.

There is a great debate about how franchise holders like FGW are allowed to continue and expand whilst operators like Virgin are always beaten at the post. Like most things it is about politics and money. The government puts cheaper cost above quality of service, they may argue otherwise but in the end they prefer cheap over customer satisfaction.

Police Radio Sketch

I thought I had posted some sketches I was writing about police officers, but trying to find it again I don't think I have. I found one of the bits of papers while having a clean out. It really is amazing what I find when I go through a pile of paper, I am always writing things down and forgetting about them.

The Police Radio Sketch

transcript log number 001234356/07 11.11.07 1205

Control:

For those of you interested there are only two quickie portions left in the canteen.

ZT12: ZT12 to Control, save me one.

RT5: RT5 to control, I outrank ZT12 me first.

ZT14: ZT14 to control, I never turn down a quickie.

SS01 (Sgt):

SS01 to all units, Boys and girls, I believe Mary in Control meant quiche as in cheese and onion. The names of the respondents has been duly noted and I congratulate them for volunteering for the latest round of diversity courses.

ZT14: So no chance of a quickie in the canteen then?

Control:

Urgent assistance required any units available for an immediate quickie in the canteen with ZT14.

[dead air, occasional sniggers from unknown units]

SS01: SS01 to ZT14, Does that answer your question?

SS01: SS01 to Control, Mary I have added your name to the list as well.

Control: Control to SS01, Roger Dodger.

How low can you go?

The barometer has dropped down to 970 mb which is 10 mb past "stormy" which I guess makes it very stormy.

However just now outside it is looking quite peaceful, a bit gloomy but not particularly windy or wet. According to the UK pressure chart I am at the centre of the low.

The barometer is suggesting it will shortly come on to a blow and it is time to batten down the hatches. I hope its not like the other night, the wind was so strong against the window I kept dreaming about trains rushing by.

Virtual Worlds

I have been thinking a bit about virtual worlds and virtual relationships. I got bored with second life, couldn't really get into it. I have always liked chat room and remember the aol uk Pub from some years ago now.

I installed IMVU about a year ago to try it out and really it was terrible, there were no chat rooms and everyone seemed to be under 16. They have done a lot of advertising and I thought I would give it another chance. Now they have public rooms and the population is generally more over 18.

I have found a nice club where you can listen to music and chat.

Anyway IMVU got me thinking, everyone in a virtual world picks an avatar who is kind of their perfect ideal, no picks an ugly avatar.

Some people separate the virtual world from the real world. They talk to people, but they never become real friends, they would never think of meeting them, it is a completely separate world.

Some make friends and fall in love, although relationships start in the virtual world they cross over into the real world.

What about when we have real virtually reality, you might be able to do everything in a virtual world and because it is an ideal world you might not want to be in reality. Will there be parts of virtual reality that stipulate only life realistic avatars are aloud. How about a relationship that only exists in a virtual world because you live thousands of miles apart.

Will the virtual and real world collide, how will we operate in such a connected future. How will we relate to people?

Things I am reminded of when I have had the worst day

Here are a few things that come to mind when I have had the worst day:

It will always look better in the morning after a good night's sleep.

If by Rudyard Kipling

"...Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools..."

Dr Evil from Austin powers:

"... Throw me a frickin' bone here! .."

Finally, I remind myself that I am me and something will hopefully present itself shortly to make life seem that little bit brighter.

I believe in myself and the fact that things have a habit of working out. Sometimes the biggest struggle is just turning up.

Emma 'Mind the Gap' Clarke Spoof announcements

You may have heard the story this week about how Emma Clarke who does the voice for announcements on the tube has not had her contract renewed. There was speculation that it had to do with her putting up some spoof announcements on her own website.

Spoof London Underground Announcements

I particular like the very last one, "Here we are again..."