Interview Number 1

I have started a new project, yes another one. This one is about writing fictional comedy around interviews of some sort. This is basically all about the conversation between two people which can be quite random and hopefully slightly funny.

Standard disclaimer applies in that these were funny in my own head, you may not find them funny at all.

Interview Number 1

Person A: So why do you want this job?

Person B: I don't

Person A: Pardon?

Person B: I don't want this specific job.

Person A: Then why come to the interview then...

Person B:Well, lets say no one comes to an interview for this job.

Person A: They do, you're here.

Person B:You are not following me at all
You are interviewing for an administration assistant right?

Person A:Well...Yes.

Person B:There are billions of admin jobs right?

Person A: I suppose...

Person B: So what I want is an admin asst job, it does not have to be this job.

Person A: So you don't want this job then.

Person B: Well I wouldn't say no.

Person A: Well thats interesting because I wouldn't say yes.

Person B: Can I suggest next question?

Person A: Do you think that would help?

Person B: At this point in the interview who can say?

Person A: Quite

Person A: Let's move on to what you know about our organisation?

Person B: The business or your personal organisation

Person A: The business of course

Person B: I know very little... I'm afraid

Person A: You are afraid?

Person B: No, I am not scared

Person A: Good, because I have had feedback I am an aggressive interviewer.

Person B: That's ok I have had feedback I am agressive when interviewed.

Person A: I always feel like I am being judged at interviews.

Person B: You are

Person A: Well yes

Person B: It is just so personal though isn't it.

Person A: Yes but that is an interview, impersonal and personal at the same time.
It is an imperfect tool in an imperfect world.

Person B: Like a 102 piece screwdriver set.

Person A: Ah but that's a perfect tool,  you have the perfect bit for any screw.

Person B: I think we should agree top disagree.

Person A: Anyway, to move the interview forward slightly

Person B:Certainly a better direction than backwards,
or sideways.

Person A:Quite

Person B: I would see myself as the 102 piece perfect tool for the reasons you just described

Person A: Which are?

Person B: I fit any job

Person A: Ah but your philosophy of screw driver bits would suggest you don't fit this specific job.

Person B: That would be one possible interpretation but I could not possibly comment

Person A: It's an interview I think you are required and compelled to comment

Person B: No comment

Person A: This is not a police interview

Person B: Good because I had a disagreement with my lawyer last night

Person A: Do you need a lawyer?

Person B: You tell me, you are the one asking the questions

Person A: Yes, I am and parking this to one side the original question was what do you know about the organisation?

Person B: I know the organisation needs and administrative assistant...